Luma

Blog Change And Update

2012-01-22T20:04:00.000-07:00

After a couple years of blogging faithfully here on Blogger I came to a crossroads this past week. It was either shut everything down and do something else with the gifts and talents the Lord has given me, or go forward in a slightly different direction. With my husband's encouragement, leading and help I have started Gospel Grace, a website dedicated to .... well, I guess you'll have to click on that link and go see what we're all about. Take a look around and familiarize yourself with the site. There will be more changes to come in the months ahead as the Lord refines our vision. We have also started a Facebook fan page. I would love it if you would "Like" us there.

All my writings from here have been transferred over. By God's grace everything went off without a hitch. I haven't made any decisions as to what I will do with this blog. I am toying with the idea of keeping it for food pictures and recipes, not sure yet. If you have any thoughts, ideas or suggestions feel free to leave a comment or send me an email. Thank you for reading and I hope you will join us in the new endeavor.

See you over at Gospel Grace...

Sabbath Song

2012-01-22T00:00:00.000-07:00

Brian Johnson - Love Came Down

Gungor - Beautiful Things

Sabbath Song

2012-01-21T10:26:00.000-07:00

This weekend I wanted to encourage people to meditate on this video. [HT: Tim Challies] Ask God how you, being in the ONE body of Christ, should respond.

It's a Girl documentary trailer:

A Bruised Reed He Will Not Crush

2012-01-17T07:32:00.000-07:00

I know the journey the Lord has brought me through is in some ways unique, but in other ways very similar to other broken men and women out there. As I was thinking through the kind of woman I want to be, how I want to help people, and the tenor and thrust of this blog as it continues to grow. (There will be some good changes happening soon.) The Lord in his grace gave me this verse:

"A Bruised reed he will not break, and a faintly burning wick he will not quench; he will faithfully bring forth justice." Isaiah 42:3 (It is also quotes as a prophesy about Jesus in Matthew 12:20)

Jesus dealt with sinners in a different way then he dealt with the Pharisees (even though they were sinners also). And so I've been thinking that if we are to imitate him, we should try to imitate the manner in which he conducted his own ministry. Another thing that came to mind is the woman caught in adultery and how he treated her and the words he spoke to her. On and on we can name many examples of how he showed compassion to those who were under the bondage of stronghold sins. Lastly, as we seek to be used by God in the spheres he has all of us in we must never forget:

"Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted." Galatians 6:1

Download Bloodlines For Free

2012-01-16T21:18:00.003-07:00

John Piper's newest book, Bloodlines can now be downloaded for free here. Pastor Piper cares very deeply about this issue and is not really concerned about selling books, he just wants to get the message out.

I listened to this sermon from Pastor Piper the other day while doing laundry. I highly recommend it: The Word of God Is at Work in You.

Grace In How We View Our Bodies

2012-01-16T10:02:00.004-07:00

One of the best articles I've read on weight, diets, body image, and that whole ball of wax, over at the Gospel Coalition.

Love And Unity In The Church And Satan's Desire

2012-01-16T08:42:00.000-07:00

An excellent post by Tim Challies on love and unity/disunity in the church based on the book of Ephesians, titled Satan's Great Desire.

Perceived Fruit Versus Actual Fruit In Children Part II

2012-01-16T08:08:00.001-07:00

I wrote in Part I of Perceived Fruit Versus Actual Fruit that we can't (and shouldn't) use our children's good outward behavior as the sole gauge of the fruit of the Holy Spirit in their hearts. In Matthew 23:25-28 Jesus says:

"Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you clean the outside of the cup and the plate, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. You blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and plate, that the outside also may be clean. Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people's bones and all uncleaness. So you also outwardly appear righteous to other, but within you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness." Matthew 23: 25-28

Not only should we heed Jesus' words here for ourselves, but we should be ever mindful of them when training our children. The first and most important thing to consider is an evaluation of our own selves with regard to these verses. This is of primary importance because children are very keen to pick up and sniff out hypocrisy. If we are a cup that is only clean from the outside, or if we are a whitewashed tomb, (or even partly so) then we confess it with Spirit led humility right now, today, while redemption is near:

"Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says, 'Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion, on the day of testing in the wilderness'... Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called 'today,' that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin." Hebrews 3:7-8, 12-13

This of course applies to all our self-indulgent petty sins. So first, we have to be mindful of the example that we set before our children.

Now what about our children's hearts? I think one of the key things to look for is whether they struggle with their sins. Not whether they sin! Of course they will sin, we should expect them to sin. (If you don't believe that then maybe some reading on the Reformed doctrine of Total Depravity might be helpful. See also Genesis 6:5, Genesis 6:12, Job 15:16, Psalm 53, Psalm 103:3, Romans 3:10) I know for a long time the entire driving force behind my parenting was fear of sin in my children and a tenacity on my part to try to root out every bad behavior that I saw was sinful. Now looking back I see that it was kind of like playing that mole game in the arcade; the mole pops up, you hit it and it drops down only to pop up again from another hole. (Yes, I had even watched the videos of "Shepherding Your Child's Heart" and I think I've read the book three or four times.) In their struggle with sin we should look for a soft grieving heart when discipline comes. Are they grieved over their sin or are they just sad about their discipline. There is a difference. Is there a teachable heart? If the child says anything like: "I'm trying not to do this but it's hard and sometimes I can't seem to stop myself." This is good insight into their heart. It means they are perceiving the sin, they are trying to control themselves, and they are recognizing that it is hard. This is our opportunity as parents to bring them to the cross. This is where we are transparent with our children and talk to them about our own struggles and how we're not going to be able to fight that sinful heart on our own. I tell my children, "that's why we need Jesus every day. Jesus who loved us and died for all those sins (Isaiah 53:5), Jesus who forgives us and cleanses us from all unrighteousness when we confess (1 John 1:9), Jesus who through his Spirit gives us victory over those sins (Romans 8:37), Jesus who will never leave us or forsake us (Deut. 31:6, Joshua 1:5, Hebrews 13: 5b-6), Jesus is making us more and more like him a little bit each day and it will take the rest of our lives (Romans 8:29)." This is how we can impart the hope of progressive sanctification to our children.

For those of us who hold to paedobaptism, we must always be on the lookout for presumption. Presumption in ourselves and/or in our children. After all, if baptism is the sign of the covenant like circumcision was, we must always remember that not all those who were circumcised in flesh were circumcised in heart. "For not all who are descended from Israel belong to Israel... So then it depends not on human will or exertion, but on God who has mercy..." (See Romans 9:6-18) I know this can be very difficult for parents, but in the end we have to recognize that it is always grace from first to last, on us and our children. The Lord doesn't give us or our children grace because of anything we have done, are doing, or will do. He gives us grace out of his own good will and for his purposes and glory. Of course we're not to be passive, it doesn't mean we don't pursue holiness, and godliness with contentment. But of course we do! However, that pursuing in itself is the Holy Spirit working out salvation in our lives and the lives of our children. Yet even that is not you, it is him. The Spirit in you.

Sabbath Song

2012-01-15T06:55:00.001-07:00

The Afters - All That I Am

Tenth Avenue North - You Are More

May you see the glory of Jesus.

Pulpit Prayer

2012-01-13T09:07:00.001-07:00

A great post on pulpit prayer from Carl Trueman over at Reformation 21. [HT: Tim Challies] This was not part of the thrust of the article, but I love the corporate use of his language. Because I just finished the book of Ezra and started the book of Nehemiah, the use of corporate language in confession and prayer is really on my mind. Even as a parent I have thought there is a certain rightness and humility when coming before the Lord in confessing the sins of our children. Of course my children are culpable for their own sin, just like every individual in Israel was culpable for their own sin. But notice Ezra, Nehemiah, Jeremiah, Isaiah, Daniel et al. all use "we" when confessing the sins "of the people". They include themselves in the "we." Don't mind the little tangent...

I'm grateful to God for being in a church that already does this, but it's always good to be encouraged and exhorted. Here's a great section from the post:

"It seems that unless somebody prays in public precisely as we think they might do in private, we all fear that this might be a form of affectation which prevents the prayer from being `authentic' -- whatever that might mean. Yet often there are people in the congregation on Sunday who have come from a week of pain, worry and confusion; they may be spiritually shattered; they might barely be able to string two words of a prayer together; and at this moment a good pastor can through a well-thought out and carefully expressed prayer draw their eyes heavenwards, lead them to the throne of grace and give them the words of adoration, confession, thanksgiving and intercession which they cannot find for themselves. -Carl Trueman, Another Thing We Do Badly, blog post

Perceived Fruit Versus Actual Fruit In Children Part I

2012-01-13T07:55:00.000-07:00

I was thinking this week that there was a time when I misread spiritual fruit in my children. I remember many years ago thinking how lovely, innocent and pure they were when I saw them playing "Little House on the Prairie" with bonnets and all. Now, don't get me wrong. I happen to love "Little House on the Prairie" it was one of the few American shows that was exported to Iraq. My parents and my sister and I would watch it and dream of coming to America. For me it holds a totally different history and context then it does in the minds of many Americans, but I digress....

So I want to write about how to look at our children realistically in Christ. I used to forget that they are their own person, they are not an extension of me. Of course the way they speak, think, and behave is a product of the culture of our home but part of it is also who they are, where their strengths and weaknesses are, their sin issues, and their likes and dislikes. These things have to be kept in mind as we evaluate our children's spiritual state. And we do have to monitor their spiritual state. We have a duty before the Lord to raise them in the nurture and admonition of Christ Jesus. Therefore, we must invest the time to know where each of our children are spiritually. After this evaluation we have a duty to love and disciple them as we correct, rebuke and/or encourage them in spiritual matters. I am NOT just talking about having family worship time, although I believe that is very important in the life of a family. That is part of the spiritual training, but it's not the only spiritual training. When you really think about it, almost everything you do as a parent spiritually trains your children. The conversation they hear you having with a friend. Wait! Did they just hear you sneer at someone?! Did you give them that strict admonition about keeping a clean room while you have three loads of unfolded laundry sitting on your own bed? How did you respond to your husband when he came home from work in a bad mood? How did your husband respond to you? On and on it goes. All these things train spiritually.

What should we be looking for? For example, would you say that a daughter who quickly gets up to help with dishes at a friends house (or at home) is showing spiritual fruit? This is actually important, hang in there with me. What if she had a smile on her face? What if she did it without her mother or father giving her a little secret signal that equals "get up and help with the dishes?" What if she cleared the entire table, went off to the kitchen, washed all the dishes, pots and pans and all, and left her hostess with a more clean kitchen then when her guests arrived? What if she did all of this without anyone asking her to do it and with a smile? Is this the consequence of spiritual fruit in the heart of said daughter? Does this give us some accurate perception about the state of her soul? The answer that we get from the examples that Jesus gives us in Scripture is a resounding: No! These types of actions, as good and kind as they may be, can not be the sole gauge for spiritual fruit in the hearts of our children. I am not saying we shouldn't train our daughters to help! And I'm certainly not saying that a daughter helping may not be the consequence of kindness the Holy Spirit is working out in her heart.

I am going somewhere with this.... hang in there. Take a few days and think about how to gauge spiritual fruit in the lives of your children.

Book Update, Cooking, Studies And Other Projects

2012-01-12T11:06:00.000-07:00

My book pile is not diminishing. As a matter of fact you will notice I have added Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges. We had out of town friends over for dinner a couple nights ago and I was sharing with them my growing number of projects, interests and the like. I am grateful for their encouragement, support and prayer for me as I step out into some uncharted waters.

Head Heart Hand Media is currently considering using me and my story in a movie (video curriculum) they will be filming for the book Christians Get Depressed Too written by David Murray. They are still just considering and I'm sure they have many people to choose from. I will update when I hear back. They have already said it may take a while. I wasn't going to blog about it but then I realized that the only reason I didn't want to say anything was because of fear. Fear of what people may say, fear of things not working out, fear that someone may get the wrong impression about my intentions and motivations, etc. etc.. I am determined to overcome that fear through the grace of Christ. It dawned on me last night that I've never really written on the topic of depression, partly due to the sensitive nature of it and partly because there's still a certain amount of stigma one must overcome. The Lord knows my heart and he knows my desires and motivations. I've decided I would rather be a "fool for Christ" then worry about some image. The Lord was kind enough to remind me of 1 Corinthians 4:10, "We are fools for Christ’s sake, but you are wise in Christ. We are weak, but you are strong. You are held in honor, but we in disrepute."

I bought Respectable Sins while we were on our extended business trip this summer but I never got around to it. It looks like that will be the next woman's study book we'll be doing at church, so I went ahead and got started yesterday. Westminster Books is having a 50% sale on all Jerry Bridges books for anyone interested.

Here is what I cooked for my 8 year old's family birthday dinner: I had to use my phone camera because the battery died on our Nikon

She asked for Ratatouille, the haute cuisine version created by Thomas Keller for the movie "Ratatouille"

I made Chicken Provencal to go along with it. The green olives in this dish are absolutely lovely!

French bread and mashed potatoes (not pictured here)

For the birthday cake she wanted a big chocolate chip cookie. This is very yummy with vanilla bean ice cream on top!

Praying Together

2012-01-12T06:31:00.000-07:00

I found this last week on the Desiring God blog and thought I would share it:

"One of the values of praying together, in fact, is that it can cut the root of pride by exposing us to the humility and heart-searching longings that get expressed in the prayers of others. My own prayers have often been reproved and corrected and deepened just by being in a group of godly people of prayer.

In fact, I wonder if we should expect our private prayer life to advance in maturity and depth and intensity if we never pray with others who can lift us higher and take us deeper. Wouldn't that be like expecting a young person to become a gifted conversationalist, but always sending him away to play by himself whenever there was a serious conversation?" John Piper, 1987

I'm Too Sinful To Be A Parent

2012-01-10T00:00:00.000-07:00

Have you ever used a harsh sharp tone with a child for some petty childish infraction? Have you stopped yourself just in time by the grace of God and given "instruction" through gritted teeth, using the most "gentle" tone you could muster at that moment? What goes through your mind right afterwards?

Usually, when something like this happens to me, I'm appalled at my inconsistencies and depth of sin. All I could think of today is: "I'm just too sinful to be a parent!" "Lord I am too sinful to parent these children!" My sin doesn't surprise God. But it surprises me sometimes. There is always a part of me that still thinks highly of me. There is always a part of me that is bewildered at the inconsistencies and the small hypocrisies in my heart. And when I come face to face with this wretchedness I flinch back from the ugliness and the overwhelming realization that I am a sinner. A broken sinner in need of a savior. I need a perfectly loving and forgiving Parent to show me how to be a loving and forgiving parent. More than that, I need a humble and tender Savior to help me overcome my own petty and childish infractions. I need a redeemer that "did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant" to teach me to serve and lay down my life for these children.

Jesus said "I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." I can't parent without Jesus. I need his goodness, his love and his mercy. Lord, be merciful to me, a sinner. Parent these eternal souls through me, I am abiding in you.

Why I Am Reading Saved By Grace

2012-01-09T12:20:00.000-07:00

Yes, I do believe women should know theology (still working on the draft of that blog post). I also believe that we are not made to be cookie-cutter saints. The Lord leads his people, men and women, through their different strengths and weaknesses, gifts, talents and callings. So why am I reading a book on soteriology? Why am I reading a book like Saved By Grace, by Anthony Hoekema?

I am studying the doctrine of salvation so that I can understand where I have been (as I continue to overcome gospel amnesia) where I am, and where I am heading spiritually. I want to understand regeneration, justification, sanctification etc. so that I can have wisdom to understand the spiritual lives of my children and how best to raise them in Christ Jesus. More importantly, I want to know my God better. I want to know his mysteries. I am not a pragmatist after all. It doesn't all have to have a practical reason. There are many things we can do as Christians for the sake of finding joy in our God.

Meditate on this: Christian, what are you doing for the sake of finding joy in your God? Is there anything you are more excited about than Jesus?

Here is a post by John Piper that speaks on finding more passion in things other than Jesus, even if they are good things like that new APP or your newest recipe or whatever. There is still a lot of things that excite me (especially books), but NOTHING compares to Christ.

Sabbath Song, Epiphany Sunday

2012-01-08T00:16:00.000-07:00

How Deep the Father's Love, Fernando Ortega

How Great Thou Art, Chris Rice

May you see the glory of Jesus.

The Holiness of God

2012-01-06T07:36:00.000-07:00

Way back when, it was R.C. Sproul's video series on The Holiness of God that captured my heart and my husband's heart, ignited a new love and fear of God, and started us on the path of consistent church attendance and a genuine desire for holy living. Tabletalk did an interview with Jerry Bridges asking him: "What do you see as the greatest need of the church today?" Below you can read a section from that interview which I wholeheartedly agree with. You can read the entire interview here. Jerry Bridges also has a new book out titled, The Transforming Power of the Gospel.

By the way folks, you can watch The Holiness of God series for free on line these days. Take advantage of that blessing. Do it with your spouse or your children or get together with other believers and watch it and discuss it.

From a Ligonier Ministries interview of Jerry Bridges:

"There are so many needs in the church today that it is difficult to single out one as the greatest. However, if I had to pick one, I would say the most fundamental need is an ever-growing awareness of the holiness of God. I don’t say this because that is the main emphasis of Ligonier Ministries but because I believe it is true...

"...How, then, can we get Christians to embrace the gospel every day? I believe Isaiah 6:1-8 gives us a paradigm for addressing this need. Isaiah sees God in His holiness, that is, His supreme majesty and infinite moral purity. In the light of God’s holiness, Isaiah is completely undone by an acute awareness of his own sinfulness. This is what we need in our churches today. Because we tend to define sin in terms of the more flagrant sins of society, we don’t see ourselves as practicing sinners.

"It is only after Isaiah has been totally devastated by the realization of his own sinfulness that he is in the right position to hear the gospel proclaimed to him by the seraphim: “Your guilt is taken away, and your sin atoned for” (v. 7).

"What happens next? Isaiah hears God say, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” Immediately he responds, “Here am I! Send me” (v. 8). What causes such an immediate and spontaneous response? It is gratitude for the forgiveness of his sins as he hears the gospel from the seraphim. Jesus said, “He who is forgiven little, loves little” (Luke 7:47). It is because the vast majority of Christians do not realize how much they have been forgiven that there is so much lethargy in the church today.

"There is an inevitable sequence in the account of Isaiah’s vision. It is God (in His holiness), guilt, gospel, and gratitude. It is deep, heartfelt gratitude for the work of Christ as proclaimed in the gospel that motivates us to pursue holiness. But it all begins with an ever-increasing realization of the holiness of God. That is why I see it as the greatest need in the church today."

Women And Choices

2012-01-05T08:39:00.000-07:00

I haven't forgotten about the Biblical Womanhood series I started back in late November. I'm still working on some research for that project. I admit that I probably published that first post too soon, but that was the choice I made at the time. Making decisions has always been a weakness of mine: Agonizing over weird details, perfectionism, fear of failure, pride, paralysis, laziness, too many interests, regret over past decisions, etc. This is actually why I read Just Do Something by Kevin DeYoung this past summer. It helped me tremendously. Every now and again to encourage me along, my husband asks if I'm over-spiritualizing whatever it is that I'm fretting over. I don't believe I'm the only woman who struggles with choices and decision-making. Being Reformed and Jesus-focused means my theology should help me to better understand and attack this debilitating habit.

Sylvia Plath wrote:

"I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor ... and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn't quite make out. ... I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn’t make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet." -Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

Sylvia Plath did not believe in God, but as wise Reformed Christians we should understand and appreciate that God fills this world with his common grace. Jesus says that God makes it rain on the just and the unjust (meaning pouring out blessing). I read this quote to my almost 13 year old two days ago as we were talking about having many interests and decision making. She knows Plath is not a Christian but she sees the wisdom to be gained from these words. Whenever we say "yes" to something we are saying "no" to many other things at the same time. A choice for one direction means a choice against another direction, but as Christian women we must make that choice. We cannot sit back out of paralysis and watch the figs wrinkle. In actuality, not making a choice is itself making a choice. For our family personally, we try to stay away from the false dichotomy of saying "if you want a husband and children you cannot do anything else." I wrote about that in the Biblical Womanhood post I linked to above. Right now, however, I want to stay to the task at hand: Women and choices.

We make many choices for or against things in the span of our lives as women. These choices build up over time. Now this can be overwhelming to some of us, which is what leads to the fretting and the fear. We want to know exactly how one choice plays out versus another, but we don't have that luxury. The Lord doesn't show us the future. He does, however, give us his word. He promises to give wisdom to those who ask in faith (James 1: 5-8), and he gives us the presence of his Holy Spirit. Moreover, Ephesians 1: 3 says, "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places." And let us not forget Hebrews 7: 25, "Consequently, he is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through him (Jesus), since he always lives to make intercession for them." Insert mine.

So we see that as Christian women we have the Holy Spirit himself, the third person of the trinity abiding in us, the word of God, his promise of wisdom when we ask in faith, every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, and our Savior himself interceding for us. Given all these objective truths spoken to us by God, how then should we approach our choices? With FAITH! Faith in the grace of God, Faith in the sovereignty of God, Faith in the wisdom of God, Faith in the providences of God, and of course our Faith in Jesus. This faith is able to lead us through the darkest times and the deepest regrets. This type of humble faith allows a woman to completely trust and rest in her God. It will help prevent the second guessing, the grasping, the internal turmoil and all those things that tend to plague some of us women. What this requires, however, is a woman who KNOWS her Savior. A woman, who like Mary, is willing to sit at his feet and learn. A woman who is learning more from her Lord than her friends or the internet on "X" subject. This means picking up our Bibles and feeding on God's word, listening to sermons, and knowing our theology so we are not tossed to and fro with every wind of doctrine.

Ladies, know your God.

Jumping on Bandwagons, New Year's Resolutions, and Submission

2012-01-04T09:49:00.000-07:00

I won't be making any "New Year's Resolutions" this year, except maybe to try to control myself from jumping on the bandwagon of the next "if you want to be godly you have to do... ." I remember being into Agrarianism; thinking foolishly that if we moved to some piece of property somewhere, milked our own cows, made our own cheese and butter, raised our own beef, kept the kids away from the world, went to some "like-minded" church where the women were "submissive" and wore head-coverings and never spoke in church except to sing with the rest of the congregation, had kids every other year, only homeschooled (because every other education method goes against the Bible) and never had book studies together but only learned from their own husbands, and NEVER touch youth groups (those are Darwinian don't you know), and baked whole wheat bread from freshly ground wheat, and where the husbands sat around smoked and talked about theology on the front porch, then we would be "living the godly life." I seriously thought that this way of life would keep my family SAFE! My kids (oops I used the word "kids" I remember how I would scornfully say that "kids" were goats and we are never to use that word, only use the words "children") would then become the models of godly little perfectly behaved children who would not be tainted by the sins of this world.

This is not a joke, nor am I being sarcastic. This is a true and deeply tragic confession. I remember trying to talk my husband into all kinds of "godly" stuff. I remember nagging him to move me out to the country. I remember having all kinds of "conversations" trying to help him see what a blessed and MORE OBEDIENT life we would have as a family. I even remember making the argument that I WOULD BECOME A MORE SUBMISSIVE WIFE if we were to go with my plan. (Anyone see the sad irony in all this.) But my husband would have none of it. One day he looked at me and said, "I'm a physicist, I'm not a farmer and we are not going to have a farm." In those days, Jesus wasn't really part of my every day self-conscious life, study or prayer. He was the basics and I already had that down, I needed deeper things. I had gospel amnesia. I disclose these things with much sadness of heart, and a regret that would choke me with its tentacles but for the grace of my God who did not leave me in that state.

I bring all this up during this first week of the year to remember and to warn. I remember not because I'm being morbidly introspective, but to be on guard for any more bandwagon jumps. And I pray that somehow by the grace of God what I write would help someone, anyone that could possibly be in the grips of any kind of delusion that any of these types of things could save them or their families. Although hiding out from the world is possible, like doing crack is possible, it is a sin and we are forbidden as Christians to run to the hills. We were not created to escape! Of course I know all about all the ways that the human mind can justify such things. I've used them all. We each only have one life. Wishing we were ANYWHERE but where we are right at this very moment is spitting in God's face and shaking our fists at his providence. I say this as someone who is all too familiar with this type of discontentment.

There were many consequences to those years that I have to live with, even now. But my God saves to the uttermost. As I've said before on this blog: Jesus is NOT a fad. He is God. And God is the only one we are ever commanded to look to, for salvation. (It took years to realize that I really thought those things would save, that's why gospel amnesia is so pernicious.)

So, I won't be making any new year's resolutions this year, not because I think they are intrinsically bad. On the contrary, our God is a God of renewals, new births, new beginnings, new mornings and new lives. I'm just content. The sinful habits, hardships, sorrows and all other things that make up the structure of my life God already intimately knows. He already has his plans made for this year. There are things he has already burdened me with that his grace will work out through me. I would rather spend the time being still, so I could hear him better.

Submission In Marriage

2012-01-03T09:23:00.001-07:00

I come from a feminist background, so for me, the issue of submission has been a very long and confusing struggle. Long because when we are raised in certain thinking patterns, it requires years of re-training to overcome and override those systems of beliefs. This is part of sanctification after all. Confusing because as I started to turn away from feminism toward Biblical femininity the models I read about were general and I didn't always know what it should look like for me personally. Moreover, as my oldest daughter pointed out to me this weekend, I became all about trying to "fix" what I thought I had done wrong before instead of just looking at Jesus and finding joy in what I "get to do" not "have to do" now. Take all that and blend it with the Patriarchy movement and you have very confusing and conflicting ideas.

Last year, by God's grace, I read what John Piper wrote about how men and women complement each other Biblically. I still need to finish reading the rest of Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood. This past summer I also read Kevin DeYoung's Freedom and Boundaries, which helped me to see the God given dignity of being a woman, which I never saw in the Patriarchy model. And I remember thinking, "I don't need to be grasping for dignity and honor," God gave that to me as a woman in Christ Jesus. There's so much I can say about how the world teaches women to grasp for dignity and honor, but let me stick to the task at hand.

This morning, however, Tim Challies posted his "The Best of January" where I found this blog post from January 2011: "Whose Wife Are You?" I'm hoping it has put me on the road to less confusion. In "Whose Wife Are You" he discusses the need to understand and practice submission within the context of your personal marriage. He references a couple of other posts I'm going to go read. One of the things he mentions is how some of us women learn how to submit to our husbands from reading a book on submission or a book on being a godly wife, which may actually train us to be helpers for a different kind of man. In actuality, we should learn how to submit from our own husbands. He also warns against judging what another woman is doing by our own personal standard of submission. I know I have been very guilty of that. So the books are good in understanding the general ideas, but not the specifics. Here's a small sample:

"Which is to say that the way my wife submits to me, as the leader in the home, may look quite different from the way another wife submits to her own husband. The big picture should be the same—he is to lead his wife and she is to follow within the role of a helper. But the particulars of that leading and following will vary a great deal based on the two personalities, based on the dynamics of the relationship, based on the stage in life, based on their individual strengths and weaknesses" - Tim Challies, Whose Wife Are You, blog post

By no means am I suggesting that we censor women from reading books by other women, God forbid. What I'm saying is that we should be circumspect to understand our own husbands. Stop comparing ourselves to other women. There's so much to say about this subject, but let's stop here for now.

Praying

2012-01-02T07:26:00.002-07:00

I read A System for Praying in 2012 on Desiring God that I wanted to share here on the blog. This line captured me:

"'If you try to seize the day, the day will eventually break you. Seize the corner of [Jesus'] garment and don't let him go until he blesses you. He will reshape the day.'" Paul Miller, A Praying Life

I've known of A Praying Life for a while, but I haven't read it yet. I understand that we all have different ways we commune with our Lord, but I thought I would pass this article along in case it could bless someone out there.

Sabbath Song, Seventh Day Of Christmastide

2012-01-01T03:30:00.000-07:00

It's the first day of the new year. My 18 year old daughter, who lives in another state, is visiting us this weekend. All my children will be home together for almost two days, I'm very blessed.

Luminate, Come Home

Great Is Thy Faithfulness

Mighty to Save

Christ And Conrad, Lead Me To The Cross

Christmas Dinner Food Pictures

2011-12-30T09:01:00.003-07:00

I forgot my camera at home when having Christmas with my family, hence, no Iraqi food pictures unfortunately. Here are a few pictures from our Christmas dinner:

Thomas Keller's Prime Rib recipe in Ad Hoc:

Blowtorching the meat first to give it a head start on the outside browning. I chose a boneless this year.

Lots of freshly cracked pepper

Lots of Kosher salt

Right before it went into the oven

Right after it came out of the oven

Husband carving

Asparagus with crimini mushrooms with onions and shallots

Potatoes Dauphinois

Horseradish cream. I used the Thomas Keller recipe that goes with the Prime Rib, this is the second time I've done this. I didn't really like it. I like it to have a sauce consistency, not a cream consistency. I'm not sure if I goofed it up, or if this is what the recipe is supposed to be like. I need to look into it.

Champagne, of course. To toast what Christ did for us in the incarnation!

The Christian Duty Of Planning and Bible Reading Methods

2011-12-28T09:04:00.002-07:00

I have had fruitful planning seasons and times of barrenness where our lives as a family have not been in order, so to speak. Planning also happens to be one of those things I like to beat myself over, lamenting about my weakness instead of overcoming it. During the last year plus I have experienced victory in many areas and I'm starting to understand just a little bit of the qualitative difference in my Christian life. I want to highly recommend an old article (1984) from John Piper titled A New Year's Plea: Plan! not because this is one of my victorious areas but because it's one of the things I'm going after. This post is not just about having a Bible reading plan (although that's in there also), it's about the Christian duty of planning. If this is one of your weaknesses, read it, you need it. If this is one of your strengths, read it, so you can become stronger and more fruitful for serving the Lord.

Now, a word about reading the Bible. Anyone who has spent any time on this blog knows that I'm constantly exhorting the readers to be reading Scripture every day. I don't want to come off as holier than thou, using fear and guilt to persuade. Been there, done that. With humility and grace and tenderness I would like to encourage all of you readers to read God's word every day of your life (not in a haphazard way). Commune with your God, be filled with the Holy Spirit, live Coram Deo. No matter how busy you are, there is always a way to make time for your Lord and Savior. Let me offer a few things that could be helpful. Look them over and decide for yourselves what would work best for you. I'm not going to talk about what I'm doing because I don't want that to influence anyone. Maybe later in the year I will share what I'm up to.

First, here is a post from Justin Taylor, Vice President of Editorial at Crossway, on the myriad of Bible Reading Plans for 2012 with links.

Second, there is more here under 2011 Bible Reading Plans from Desiring God, there may be some overlap.

Third, Tim Challies is doing a Facebook Group for those interested in doing Professor Horner's Bible Reading Plan with him. You can also do the audio version.

Here's something from Noel Piper that may help some folks who really struggle with finishing a "Bible Reading Plan" or for those who have finished Bible reading plans but want something a little different to do this year for spiritual growth.

The past three years I have done the Discipleship Journal Reading Plan which you can find toward the bottom of the page here.

You don't have to do any of these "Plans" they are just tools, but I strongly encourage all to find some way to read your Bible. Remember there are principles and methods, I wrote about the difference in the gospel amnesia series I did over the summer. The principle is to read God's word and pray, this is not optional for a Christian. The method is the way you go about this. There are many methods, what works for one person may not work for another. Choose a method that works for you, even if you have to make up your own.

For Sin Will Have No Dominion Over You

2011-12-27T10:25:00.000-07:00

For those of us that are painfully aware of our sins and are easily tempted toward morbid introspection, it is hard NOT to feel like sin has dominion over us. Not being sufficiently gospel minded hinders us even more. Being told to "just stop it" is about as helpful as telling the rocks to cry out "praise the Lord!" What most of us need in that situation is to be reminded of who Jesus is and what he did, and to be reminded in a gracious and tender manner.

A few weeks back I was in my study of By His Wounds You Are Healed when something caught my eye:

"For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are NOT under law but under GRACE." Romans 6:14, emphasis mine.

My first thought was, "wait, what?" I read it again, "YOU ARE NOT UNDER LAW BUT UNDER GRACE." My next thought was "no Lord, that can't be, if I'm not under law then I won't obey, I won't seek to do good, I won't DO righteous things." At this point my eyes dart back to the preceding paragraph where Alsup writes: "We cannot understand our redemption if we do not understand our slavery." I started thinking about how the fruit of slavery to sin is death, but the fruit of slavery to God is sanctification. "You're under MY grace, Luma" By this time my heart is racing and I'm trying to grasp what that can possibly mean: "You, Luma, are NO LONGER captive to your sins. You are not under law." I started remembering how I used to dislike these words. I remember thinking "If I'm under grace then I'll feel like I won't work at being good." This grappling went on for a while. The rest of the evening was spent telling myself: "Sin has no dominion over me, I don't have to obey it."

There is depth in the soul when it starts to grasp what it means to live under the grace of God. There have been a couple of bitter thorns that I have wrestled with for a year now. One in particular I dreaded and feared and gave into time and time again. I just couldn't conquer it. It filled me with poison and though I have prayed to be free from it I was not seeing any palpable victory. Last week I asked two friends to pray in particular for this wretched bitterness in my heart that was causing me a lot of misery and anxiety. I was set free from it on Christmas day. That was the Lord's present to me: Undeserved grace, setting me free from the dominion of this particular sin. I remembered Isaiah 30:18

"Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. for the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him." Isaiah 30:18

Christian, remember: "For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace." The word of God is powerful and it can give real and tangible victory.

"For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart." Hebrews 4:12

What To Do When We Feel Fragile

2011-12-26T07:34:00.002-07:00

I suppose one of the reasons I respond so well to a minister of God's word like John Piper is because he's the type of man that won't shrink back from admitting he's fragile sometimes. I connect with that, I feel fragile often, and I need to know how to fight it off. Advice "preached" at me does nothing, it is like a "noisy gong or a clanging cymbal." It does not have the love, grace, and humility which marked Jesus and which should mark ALL his disciples, especially his shepherds/elders. But when one of God's shepherds writes an article like What To Do If You Wake Up Feeling Fragile it is received with a grateful heart. Read it and you will see that it is written with empathy, there's not even a whiff of a critical spirit in it. This is grace washing over a fragile soul.

Sabbath Song, Christmas Day

2011-12-25T00:00:00.000-07:00

Merry Christmas! May you see the glory of Jesus!

Joy To The World, David Crowder Band

Good Christian Men Rejoice (boy was it hard to find a decent version)

Go Tell It On The Mountain, David Crowder Band

Sean Quigley, Little Drummer Boy

The Magi

2011-12-24T14:07:00.001-07:00

An article posted by David Mathis over at Desiring God discussing the magi that came to visit Jesus, We Three Kings of Orient Aren't. Excellent article and reminds us of the need for disciplined, Biblical exegesis.

The Incarnation

2011-12-23T06:33:00.001-07:00

The Incarnation, by Odd Thomas. Thanks to Tim Challies:

Christmas In A Nutshell

2011-12-23T05:28:00.000-07:00

Thank you Tim Challies for this:

Tebow

2011-12-23T04:10:00.000-07:00

Wendy Alsup, author and blogger over at Practical Theology for Women has posted an excellent piece on Tebow titled Thoughts on Tebow, SNL, and Jesus. I highly recommend it.

Satisfied With God Himself

2011-12-22T05:30:00.000-07:00

Being in a lot of physical pain over the weekend had me grouchy and not rejoicing in my Lord very much. I watched this little 2 minute video from Noel Piper (John Piper's wife) twice, listening especially to what she says in the end.

Masgouf

2011-12-21T05:00:00.000-07:00

So with Christmas coming up and everyone in a feasting mood I thought I would take some time to talk about some Iraqi dishes that we will be preparing for this upcoming weekend. My parents were over for tea last night and we started talking about dishes that were specific to Iraq itself and not to just "Middle Eastern" food. After they left, I spent some time researching some dishes on YouTube.

Let's dig into some Iraqi dishes:

Masgouf (impaled fish) is considered to be the national dish of Iraq. Can you guess why? Well, if you've got the Tigris running right through your country, you better believe you're going to find some good things to eat in there. My parents mentioned the famous Abu Nawas district, restaurants situated right on the Tigris well known for Masgouf. So here's how you make this dish:

Recipe:

Take a freshwater Carp, caught in the Tigris
Scale, cut and clean
Cut and open flat
Rub with olive oil
Season with salt and with the following optional seasonings: tamarind, and/or turmeric
Impale on a stick
Cook beside an open wood fire
Garnish with lemons, and serve with fresh pita bread, pickles and salad
*Oh and it probably tastes even better when you eat it right by the riverbank

Think I'm making this? Not this weekend! But I do think I'm going to try it. I need to find out where I can buy some Carp. I won't be able to go catch it from the Tigris, though. I just don't see a plausible import/export business for Carp. Do you? All joking aside I hope you enjoy the following videos:

So here is what my mom and I are really making:

Kletcha (a "cookie" made with raised dough, some will be filled with dates and some with a nuts and sugar mix)

Chicken Curry

Lamb Dob

Rice pilaf with nuts and raisins

Kibee Hilwee (A traditional Christmas dish for Christian Northern Iraqis like us that come from the town of Mousel (Ninevah). There are other Kibee dishes cooked during the year but this version which is a bit sweet and sour is the one that is especially made at Christmas time and the New Year)

I'll try to post some pictures next week.

Christian Love

2011-12-20T12:30:00.000-07:00

This was something convicting and encouraging:

"The greatest evidence that heaven has invaded our sphere, that the Spirit has been poured out upon us, that we are citizens of a kingdom not yet consummated, is Christian love." - D.A. Carson, Showing The Spirit

And every time we are tempted to think that only those that think exactly like we do are the only real and true brethren let's remember this:

"For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?" Matthew 5:46

and

"If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them." Luke 6:32

and

"And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same?" Matthew 5:47

and

"And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same." Luke 6:33

The Worship Wars

2011-12-20T07:35:00.001-07:00

What is known as "the worship wars" have plagued Christian congregations in North America for many years now. For me this could easily be looked at as another area where gospel amnesia has had a tragic impact. But that's another post for another day. In the meantime, I would like to recommend the following for anyone that cares to keep their eyes on Christ and to love their brethren rightly:

Yesterday I watched this video of John Piper and Bob Kauflin on Worship Music from the Gravity and Gladness seminar. These are people that are really thinking through their worship music, exactly what you would expect from John Piper after all.

A Critique of Worship Music Criticism is important for Christians to read because we have all done it, we have all criticized one type of music or another. That's over at Parchment & Pen, a thanks to Tim Challies for that link. Here's a sample:

"Yes, I am coming to the understanding that nit-picking at music and especially music that encourages us to offer praise and thanksgiving to God and reflect on his greatness can actually discourage the praise we are commended to offer. This motivates me to ask a few questions with regard to why we find it necessary to be over-critical of worship music, to the extent that it can appear to have no redeeming value.

"Now, I do recognize that some songs have troubled lyrics that are inconsistent with the nature and self-revelation of God. I think such inconsistencies deserve to be noted. But that is different than criticizing a song because the lyrics or musical 1-4-5 arrangements are too simple. To criticize a song that encourages the praise and worship of God, and especially one with no inconsistencies, is to say that our musical and lyrical preferences supersedes our praise of God." - Lisa Robinson

A Different Kind of Sad Death

2011-12-18T19:12:00.000-07:00

I just found out that Denise Sproul, wife of R.C. Sproul Jr. passed away today after a very long and brutal war with cancer. We had been praying for her since we found out of her diagnosis. She has suffered much but she is now with our Savior. My personal prayer was that the Lord will in his mercy save her for her children's sake. I trust in my Lord's sovereignty and I know that he knows better than me what is best for Denise and the Sproul family.

With Christopher Hitchens it was sad and sobering to know he was most likely in torment. See what John Piper said here. But Denise's death is a different sadness. I never knew her personally but our family felt connected with the Sprouls through R.C. Jr.'s ministry. We've spoken to R.C. a few times seeking wisdom, we supported his ministry for many years, and so on. Our family had prayed for Denise during an earlier battle with cancer some years back. I know in my mind that Denise is beholding Jesus, and that is glorious. But my heart aches for all the kids. Yet, I know my God and I know that he withholds no good thing, Psalm 84:11. Rest in peace Denise Sproul, you were a faithful wife and a faithful mother.

"For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly" Psalm 84:11

True Piety

2011-12-18T16:06:00.002-07:00

I'm almost finished with Jesus + Nothing = Everything. Tchividjian quotes Sinclair Ferguson:

"Those who have almost forgotten about their own spirituality because their focus is so exclusively on their union with Jesus Christ and what He has accomplished are those who are growing and exhibiting fruitfulness. Historically speaking whenever the piety of a particular group is focused on our spirituality, that piety will eventually exhaust itself on its own resources. Only when our piety forgets about us and focuses on Jesus Christ will our piety be nourished by the ongoing resources the Spirit brings to us from the source of all true piety, our Lord Jesus Christ." - Sinclair Ferguson

It's good and right to seek spiritual maturity, but we must remember that sanctification is an act of grace from God through the Holy Spirit. It is especially important to remember this as parents. We want to train our children to seek Jesus, to live in his grace and allow the fruit of the Spirit to flow from there. The last thing we want to do is communicate to our children that doing certain things will make them "holy."

Here's one other quote from Tchividjian:

"The first sin that needs to be rooted out and attacked is not immoral behavior, it's immoral belief – the belief that my Christian life is all about my moral and spiritual progress." -Tullian Tchividjian (emphasis mine)

Stressing Joseph Again

2011-12-18T10:11:00.001-07:00

Last week I wrote a post titled, Thinking About Joseph where I was urging folks to start thinking more seriously and deeply about Joseph and his faith. There's an article over at the Gospel Coalition, trying to stress some similar points. I would highly recommend reading it. Father to God, Model for Us by Russell Moore, author of Adopted for Life: The Priority of Adoption for Christian Families and Churches, which I have not read yet.

Sabbath Song, Fourth Sunday In Advent

2011-12-18T00:00:00.000-07:00

A lot of Christmas classics below and then some.

I thought it would be good for the soul to remind us of this: Nothing But The Blood - Third Day

One of my husband's favorites: God of Wonders - Third Day

One of my favorites: Show Me Your Glory - Third Day

Your Love Oh Lord - Third Day

Do You Hear What I Hear - Third Day

Angels We Have Heard On High - Third Day

O Holy Night - Third Day

O Come All Ye Faithful - Third Day

What Child Is This - Third Day

Christopher Hitchens Obituary

2011-12-16T18:25:00.002-07:00

Doug Wilson has written an excellent obituary of Christopher Hitchens over at Christianity Today.

A Sad Death

2011-12-16T09:41:00.000-07:00

My husband told me last night that Christopher Hitchens passed away. My first question to him was: Can you check to see if anyone has said that he turned to the Lord before he died?" I know that he was an atheist, and a very outspoken one at that. This makes it all the more sad for me. The gospel was given to him by many, including his brother. One of the saddest things that my husband and I were talking about concerns when he said that if he ever recants his atheism and seeks God in his last delusional moments, not to believe it. This is very enigmatic for me. Christopher Hitchens is a real intellectual, and it seems he has dealt with his cancer on that level. You can see an interview here.

I know that there will be some Christians who will snort at his intellectualism and see it as his stumbling block of why he couldn't come to Christ. This is wrong on so many levels. I won't go into it right now but I would encourage Christians everywhere to not mock this man, his atheism, or the fact that he was an intellectual. Be very very careful and guard your hearts against mockery in the name of Christ. Christopher Hitchens may have been blind, but I've known many Christians who were/are blind also. We should be a sober and a humble people. Instead, pray that his wife and children will be saved by the grace of Jesus Christ.

As an aside I want to mention that some time back Doug Wilson debated Christopher Hitchens in a video debate called "Collision." Our whole family watched it when it first came out, including our kids. We were able to have discussion without mocking an unbeliever. (I'm grateful to my friend Cathi whose email reminded me that it was important to talk about this.)

Cooking and Writing

2011-12-15T12:55:00.000-07:00

I've been working on a writing project, we'll see what the Lord does with that. In the meantime, here's some of what I've been cooking (no, I don't take a picture of everything I make).

This is one of my throw all the leftovers from the refrigerator into a frittata dinners (bacon, salami, mushrooms, shallots, green peppers, onions), that's cheddar melting on top, I happened to have that on hand.

Sourdough bread toast (no I didn't make the bread, it's been a while since I've made baguettes).

I love my little Japanese cast-iron pot.

Shredded pork verde, the family said it was the best I had ever made.

No, I didn't make this but I did eat it. This was my lovely dinner at Roy's where we went for a company Christmas party.

Had a friend over for "fish night," it's the easiest meal I make. I buy some nice dark bread (usually a dark rye), break open a bunch of these Trader Joe's cans of fish (Anchovy fillets, smoked sardines, smoked trout, smoked herring and sometimes I buy smoked salmon) and pair it up with a bottle of champagne. So YUMMY! Sometimes I'll have fruit on hand or chocolate to finish with.

Pot roast with turnips, parsnips, carrots, potatoes, onions and bouquet garni. I decided to throw the herbs in there instead of tying them with twine (shhhh... don't tell Thomas Keller).

Well, I finally did it. I made "Filets De Poisson Pochés Au Vin Blanc" that's fish filets poached in white wine. Costco had fresh wild Dover sole filets, which I fell in love with and brought home. In the end I thought the fish itself was the loveliest, flakiest, most tender and light I had ever had, but I DID NOT like the white wine I poached it in. There was a bitterness to it that ruined the dish as a whole. I'm in love with the wild Dover though. I'll have to find another way to cook it.

While we were having our "fish night" dinner my friend Jo brought a gingerbread house for the kiddos to decorate. Above are real gingerbread man cookies as well.

Here's the 9 month old munchkin puckering up while eating his gingerbread man. He is an absolute delight! A grace and a mercy from my Father in heaven.

Welcome To Rome

2011-12-15T06:00:00.000-07:00

My friend Kristina sent a link to an Arizona Central article entitled Billboard Campaign Hopes To Dispel Atheist Stereotypes. The Freedom From Religion Foundation is sponsoring billboards by local neighborhood atheists, agnostics and the like in hopes that they can "dispel" some stereotypes. First we got bombarded with the Mormon billboards and now the Atheists, every "religion" wants a microphone in the public square. Welcome to Rome! There is no reason to panic and run to the hills to "protect" the family. Remember the gospel of Jesus Christ conquered Rome!!

Why Gospel Grace Is Not A Fad

2011-12-14T22:50:00.000-07:00

Several things have converged to remind me how important it is to keep our eyes on the gospel. One of those things is a post Tim Challies wrote titled Evidences of God's Grace. I have been weary the last couple of weeks and his post helped me to step outside my tunnel to see things the way God sees them. But then I was reading through the comments and a few made me sad. They reminded me of how I used to think and talk when I had gospel amnesia. I remember being afraid of grace, very afraid of grace. I know how that fear manifests itself. This is precisely why we must stay focused on Christ. Gospel grace is not a fad, it is the power of God unto salvation AND sanctification.

Thinking About Joseph

2011-12-12T17:28:00.000-07:00

I've been watching The Nativity Story which has caused me to think deeply about Joseph, Jesus' earthly father. The Bible doesn't tell us a lot about him, yet there is much we can learn from this man even from the little bits that Scripture reveals. Remember, this is coming from my Reformed Protestant perspective:

I have been thinking about his great faith. He had to have a deep steadfast faith in the promises of God to take Mary for a wife. Think about it: A young woman who outwardly looked as if she had broken all the betrothal vows and then some. He believed God! He believed and acted on that belief through outward obedience. He married her, he gave her his name, he husbanded her, he took God's son to Egypt, he brought Jesus back to Nazareth, he loved and raised Jesus as a father, and he trained Jesus to be a carpenter. Joseph had Jesus, the son of God, the second person of the trinity under his earthly authority. He responded the way the Lord asks all of us to respond: He gave his life and reputation for Jesus. It is stunning!

God gave us Mary and Joseph as examples of a man and a woman of unshakeable faith. Take the time to think about them, their relationship to God and to each other. Joseph's strengths as a husband and father, Mary's submission to God and to her husband. Meditate on their obedience and humility. Mary and Joseph were our Lord's human parents. Shouldn't we desire to learn from their example? There is no need to fear idolatry here.

The Heart Of The Matter

2011-12-11T16:29:00.000-07:00

A few days ago my friend who lives in D.C. was trying to minister to me over email. The Lord's mysterious providneces never cease to amaze me. She had heard a song that morning which a couple years ago had been helpful to her. Knowing how I respond to music she sent it along to me with an exhortation. Of course, our God is mighty and his works in the heart of man are intricate and so it accomplished what he meant for it to do. And yes, I do believe the Lord can use a Don Henley song to work on hearts.

Don Henley, "The Heart of the Matter." I remember this from the late 1980's but it came with new meaning and application now.

Here are the lyrics:

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And the struggles we went through
And how I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
...People filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
The trust and self-assurance that can lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work I put between us,
Doesn't keep me warm

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you, Baby
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But everything changes
And my friends seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

There are people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down and hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you inside

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

Sabbath Song, Third Sunday In Advent

2011-12-11T00:47:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago I discovered that Annie Lennox had released a Christmas Album in 2010 titled, "Christmas Cornucopia." I have always admired Annie Lennox, since her Eurythmics days. I don't know what to make of her humanism, but she sings all these beautiful words and I long for her to mean them.

Angels From the Realms of Glory

Love the Middle Eastern sounding drums in this: God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

Oh Little Town of Bethlehem

The Holly And The Ivy

Silent Night

May you see the glory of Jesus.

My Children, I Want To See You On The Road To Glory

2011-12-08T18:53:00.000-07:00

Yesterday over at Redeemer Blog there was a post reminding readers of a sermon by John Piper from back on May 8, 1988 entitled, "Raising Children Who Hope in the Triumph of God".

It is only a 28 minute sermon, I strongly encourage all parents to listen to it. As an aside, I want to mention that this is a 1988 sermon, with John Piper bringing up the point of the entire family being in corporate worship together long before the "family-integrated" movement. It turns out that his church has always had children in the worship service. What are your children seeing when they watch you worship the Lord on Sundays? Piper encourages parents to "show them how you love to worship God."I could say oh so much about this, but that's not what this particular post is about.

Let me pose a question: What happens when you do all these things (all the things he mentions in that sermon) and your children still make choices that break your heart and drive you to your knees? How does your theology inform how you deal with these situations? It could be something as simple as a young adult searching the scriptures and choosing to believe in paedobaptism but whose parents are Southern Baptists, or it could be hard-core rebellion (take your pick of vices: drugs, sexual promiscuity, dabbling in homosexuality, abuse of alcohol, pornography, etc. etc.). Our children, are their own moral agents. Let me say this again: Our children are their own moral agents. They have their own vertical relationship to Jesus Christ and it DOES NOT go through us. There are a lot of tangential lines tempting me but I want to stay locked in on one thing: Children are not extensions of their parents. They are human beings with real culpability, generate or unregenerate, accountable to God for their own souls. (I am not discussing here the covenant duties of parents, that's a given in my book.)

Children will disappoint their parents, they are human, and as fallen man we all sin against each other and disappoint each other. Our heavenly Father is the perfect parent, he is a perfect Father to us his children and YET how many of us sin and rebel against him every day? Jesus said that a servant is not greater than his master, so we must be careful in our expectations of our children. We are to parent them, the way the Lord parents us. We don't even come close to being the kind of parent our God is, and yet we think we can expect to put in the coins of our covenant duties and out of the covenant home machine will come out this child you have perfectly fashioned to think what you want them to think and believe what you want them to believe and act the way you want them to act–by golly.

The greatest joys for a parent should be to see their children on the road to glory, with a real palpable faith and relationship to Jesus Christ. (That means we should be seeing real signs of the work of the Holy Spirit in their lives, outward conformity doesn't count–See Galatians 5:22-23.) We should not eclipse this by being distracted with things that would take our focus off Christ. No "100 year plan" and "vision" for your "multi-generational family" is going take the place of the Holy Spirit working on your child's heart. God sits on his throne in heaven and mocks the "plans" of men, Christian or not. So let's be gospel-oriented, not (fill in the blank) oriented.

I'll end with a question: Do your children (no matter their age) see you more excited about Jesus Christ or something else (it doesn't matter how "god-honoring" that other thing may be)? Is your soul on fire for Jesus and driven to serve him for his glory or are you more on fire for..... ? What is your conscience saying to you right now?

Book Update

2011-12-07T14:49:00.000-07:00

The rest of the books my husband gave me as birthday/Christmas presents came in a few days ago:

Love & Economics, It takes a family to raise a village by Jennifer Roback Morse, PhD , founder and president of The Ruth Institute, a project of the National Organization for Marriage Education Fund. I am reading this book (recommended by a friend who thinks deeply and Christianly about these issues) as part of my studies and research for the Biblical Womanhood posts. Dr. Morse is an economist, but she is also a devoted wife and mother.

The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller with Kathy Keller. My husband started reading it to me last night. I believe it's going to be a great book and will provide much for us to discuss as husband and wife.

Showing The Spirit, A Theological Exposition of 1 Corinthians 12-14 by D.A. Carson.

For the kids we got: Get Wisdom, 23 Lessons for Children About Living for Jesus by Ruth Younts and The Gospel Story Bible, Discovering Jesus in the Old and New Testaments by Marty Machowski the same author of our family devotions book: Long Story Short.

I'm pretty sure my cello is going to cut into my reading time but that's okay, it's all blessing the family in different ways.

When A Man Loves A Woman

2011-12-06T20:26:00.000-07:00

When a man loves a woman, he buys her a cello.
When he gives her the cello, she asks for a bow to go with it.
When he hands her the bow, she sits down to play.
She starts playing and enjoying the beautiful tones of her cello.
Then they both realize that it's very important for him to teach her a few things about notes.
So he spends some time teaching her a bit about harmony, music notes, and what tuning in fifths means.
And chances are, if a man loves a woman and gives her a cello, she'll want lessons to go with it.

Playing the first night. (Those are Christmas tree lights reflecting off the front)

I don't have a stand yet so I had to set it up in a corner to take a picture. It looks reddish but it's actually not. I bought it because it's a more muted brown than some of the other ones we looked at. I had my first cello lesson today with a real cello teacher!! Yes, I am very excited to be learning.

A New Commandment

2011-12-06T10:31:00.000-07:00

I'm almost to the end of my "read the Bible in a year" program. I think I've mentioned before that the one I've been using the past three years I downloaded from John Piper's Desiring God ministries. I may put some links to those in the beginning of 2012 for those interested.

In John 13 Jesus washed his disciples' feet, he talked to them about being that kind of a servant. I've always liked this verse:

"You call me Teacher and Lord, and you are right, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example..." John 13:13-15

I love that Jesus in these verses affirms he is our Lord. This is not pride or arrogance, this is not him letting us know who's boss. This is a fact in the cosmos, Jesus Christ is Lord. But oh! Look at the type of Lord he is! "If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet...." I can write on and on about this but let me get to the heart of this post.

After discussing Judas' betrayal, Jesus tells the disciples he has a new commandment for them. My spiritual eyes must be very slow. It dawned on me this morning that Jesus did indeed give a new commandment. He gave a new law! All these years I have thought he was just affirming and stressing how important it is to "love your neighbor as yourself" but look at what the verse REALLY says:

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13: 34-36

We are no longer to just love our neighbor as ourselves, Jesus gives a new commandment. He amplifies what earlier in his ministry he called one of the two greatest commandments. He now qualifies it with "just as I have loved you." This is radical! He says this to them hours before his arrest, after spending 3 years of teaching them, loving them, serving them. He also says it after he had just gotten done at giving them a real physical example of that love: Washing their feet, and giving the morsel of bread to Judas. The love he just got done showing is a humble, service oriented, other oriented, to the point of feeding your betrayer oriented kind of love. Which one of us can say that we love our brothers and sisters in Christ in this way? Jesus said that's how the world will know we are his.

I did do a bit of research (not exhaustive in the least) but it seems that it's only here in John's gospel that Jesus uses the phrase "A new commandment." John is consistent, however, because he uses similar phrasing in all his writing. So I'm taking this to mean that as the Holy Spirit moved in John, there was something particular that he (the Spirit) wanted to stress through the words "a new commandment;" and then qualifying that heavily by either Jesus' examples, or discussions on the love of God, the love of Christ and brotherly love which John's gospel and all his works are riddled with. I think that this is so that we get a full and rich picture of what Jesus meant by "just as I have loved you" – namely, to the point of death on the cross.

Of Pride, Humiliation, Shame and Godly Humility

2011-12-05T06:41:00.000-07:00

As John Owen wrote, "be killing sin or it will be killing you." A few months back I read C.J. Mahaney's book, Humility and since then I have been following the recommendations in the back of that book to read other books that will weaken pride and arrogance and bear the fruit of godly humility and genuine submission to God. I have been so tenacious and single minded about this that I neglected to remember a very important thing that I know about God: He tests his children as the Holy Spirit is working on them. I have been getting some quizzes along the way but I received a major exam this week. It's still going so I don't think my final grade is in. I don't necessarily have much to say about the sin of pride at the moment. Instead, I have a few things to say about idols of the heart and how God chooses to show them to us.

We can know that we have raised something to the level of an idol when our reactions include: Anger, anxiety, grasping, desire to control, manipulation of a situation, spin, making up our own version of the scenario, panic, damage control, etc. As I struggled with this during the past few days I have had to stop, take a deep breath, lean deep into the arms of God and stop my racing mind. It was at this point, when I stopped and leaned into Christ, that he so graciously revealed the idols of my heart. And I couldn't turn my eyes away as he was forcing me to look upon them. He is bent on destroying every tiny piece of pride and arrogance in this heart. And I'm grateful for the hard grace. If he were to let me go my own way I would become continually hardened, but it is the grace of God in Christ that gives us a heart of flesh. I know there's more to say, but let this suffice for now.

So for those who battle the sins of pride and arrogance, when the Lord brings about circumstances that may humiliate or shame you, be grateful for that grace and bend the knee. Bend the knee before Jesus and ask the Spirit to quiet your soul. Humble yourself under the mighty hand of God. He is not bringing these things to destroy you, he is training you and raising you up to into the image of Christ.

Sabbath Song, Second Sunday In Advent

2011-12-04T05:00:00.000-07:00

I have never seen not one single episode of American Idol, but when I was researching for this song, I found this guy: Clay Aiken. I guess he was pretty hot stuff on American Idol.

Here is Clay Aiken singing "Mary Did You Know"

Fernando Ortega singing "Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence" the video is a bit cheesy but... I'm at the mercy of YouTube

How hard can it be to find a decent rendition of "Of The Father's Love Begotten" you ask? Well, hard and time consuming. A friend and I sang this in Latin (Corde Natus Ex Parentis) at an Advent Celebration night a few years back. No, we didn't make a YouTube of it.

I said I was eclectic. Yes, I do enjoy this also: King's College Cambridge "In Dulci Jubilo" I love seeing God's majesty and beauty expressed in so many different ways around this world: "Good Christian Men, Rejoice"

"Ding! Dong! Merrily On High"

And just for kicks because I could NOT resist: "The Holy And The Ivy"

Book Update

2011-12-02T07:44:00.000-07:00

Finished The Enemy Within this morning and I'm very excited to be starting By His Wounds You Are Healed, how the message of Ephesians transforms a woman's identity by Wendy Horger Alsup.

My husband bought a bunch of books for me as my birthday/Christmas presents. Only one of them has arrived: Jesus + Nothing = Everything by Tullian Tchividjian. I'll do an update as soon as they get here. I praise God for Westminster Books and for free shipping, using UPS no less. How awesome is that?!

Wendy Alsup quotes John Stott from his commentary on Ephesians:

"Therefore we are to demonstrate plainly and visibly by our new life the reality of this new thing which God has done: first by the unity and diversity of our common life, secondly by the purity and love of our everyday behavior, next by the mutual submissiveness and care of our relationships at home, and lastly by our stability in the fight against the principalities and powers of evil. Then in the fullness of time God's purpose of unification will be brought to completion under the headship of Jesus Christ. ... The whole letter is thus a magnificent combination of Christian doctrine and Christian duty, Christian faith and Christian life, what God has done through Christ and what we must be and do in consequence." -John Stott, The Message of Ephesians

Super Woman, Abiding Woman

2011-12-01T20:08:00.000-07:00

I saw this over at Redeemer's Blog. Redeemer is the church we attended while living in Pittsburgh over the summer. I thought I would share it with you:

I LOVE The Cello!

2011-12-01T11:49:00.000-07:00

I have been in love with the cello for as long as I can remember. And for as long as I can remember I have told myself that when I'm older and I can afford cello lessons I want to learn how to play. I got these videos from Challies' blog. It's just glorious:

Birthday Reflections

2011-11-29T23:28:00.000-07:00

It was my birthday today. I took my mother out to breakfast and to her favorite store to honor her for giving birth to me. When I was young and we lived in Iraq my mother worked; she was a mathematics and physics teacher. She talked to me about how families helped each other, about how no mother in Iraq bore all the burdens that she sees the church in America laying on women. (Isolated stay-at-home-moms doing all the work of the household all on their own). Very rarely did you see a "nuclear" family living on their own in Iraq. Almost always the household was larger with either parents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles or what have you. Everyone in the household worked together for the good of the household and the economic progress of the household. Everyone pitched in, no woman ever needed to drag all her children to go shopping because there was always either someone at home or someone willing to do the shopping, etc. I've come to think that one of the reasons the American nuclear family started falling apart in the 60's and 70's is because they were an isolated system that was easy to attack.

"And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken." Ecclesiastes 4:12

Households are like a threefold cord!

I spent a lot of time ruminating on my life today. Where I've been, where I am, and where I am going. These verses in Isaiah have always been very precious to me:

"I will say to the north, give up, and to the south, do not withhold; bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the end of the earth, everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made." Isaiah 43:6-7

Today, especially, I am seeing how I have always belonged to God. He made me in my mothers womb from the bloodlines of the Assyrians and the Chaldeans. Schooled me under Muslim teachers who loved to beat my hands with a rod at the smallest mistakes made in class. He moved me to Greece where my father spoke the gospel to me and I accepted Jesus at a train station in Thessaloniki. He moved me again to Los Angeles California. Reeling with culture shock I lived many many years in despair of ever fitting in with Americans and their culture. I felt lost and small not knowing who I was, where I belonged, to whom I belonged, and to what I was called. I spent years hating the life I had been given, but the Lord's plans were not to be thwarted. I lived. I lived through many trials and tribulations. A broken sinner in need of a savior. But now, 42 years later, I see that I always belonged to God. He called me from the end of the earth and put his name on me. He made me and formed me for his glory. I cannot squander this life.

Speaking of community, in the providence of God we went out to dinner with several families to a restaurant that is owned by the parents of one of my neighbors. All I did was follow the lead of the Holy Spirit. The Lord had a very unique birthday planned for me. It was an evening of good Chianti, karaoke, and a testimony to the power of gospel love, reconciliation, forgiveness and Biblical community.

More Than Book Knowlege; A Book Update

2011-11-29T15:24:00.000-07:00

It's true I'm a heavy reader, but I'm no gnostic. Through the grace of God these books bear fruit in every day life. I overheard my girls the other day telling their four year old brother that he's an egghead. It was a good teaching opportunity for me to explain to all the kids that the word "egghead" is actually used in a derogatory way to mock and look with disdain on people who happen to be called to a life of heavy reading or other similar academic activities. These are things I want them to value. I don't want them to be ashamed if that happens to be part of the gifts and talents that the Lord gives them. Neither do I want them to become arrogant, head-knowledge only adults. We want to be good stewards of our gifts and talents but always with humility and a heart that is tender toward God and man.

During the last week I have finished my study on the incommunicable attributes of God in Grudem's Systematic Theology textbook. At some point I'll read that same section in Michael Horton's systematic theology book also. I also finished Becoming God's True Woman edited by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. The chapters are written by different women. And lastly, Unfashionable by Tullian Tchividjian.

My pastor was good to point out this past Sunday that although it's good to know about the character of God in a systematic and logical way, it is crucial for us to also remember that our God has chosen to use stories, poetry, and wisdom literature to communicate to us about himself. We are in the middle of a sermon series on Habakkuk right now. I was thinking during the sermon that as good as it is for my soul to understand the aseity, the eternality, the immutability of God and his other attributes; it is even more beautiful and deep to read:

"His splendor covered the heavens, and the earth was full of his praise. His brightness was like the light; rays flashed from his hand; and there he veiled his power. Before him went pestilence, and plague followed at his heels. He stood and measured the earth; he looked and shook the nations; then the eternal mountains were scattered; the everlasting hills sank low. His were the everlasting ways." Habakkuk 3: 3-6

And then to see the connection between these verses and other verses in the Old Testament, it was like when the movie "Pleasantville" goes from black and white to color (but without the sin factor). So what I'm saying is that it was profitable for me to dig into systematic theology, it made me appreciate the word of God to a higher degree. But I also know that my relationship with Christ is so much more than just a list of attributes.

There were some real nuggets in Becoming God's True Woman. I wish I had time to write about that. As for Unfashionable, it really deserves it's own post. It's no wonder the book has three pages filled front and back with praises and recommendations. My husband thought it was outstanding. The guy is anything BUT antinomian!! The sections on worldliness, segregation in the church, and reconciliation in the church resonated with me in particular. I learned more about real Biblical community and "integration" than all those years when I "thought" I knew all about integrated-this and integrated that. And yes I am deeply committed to not ONLY a family worshiping together but all ages worshiping together–the community of God worshiping together. More on this topic later.

The next book I started last night is: The Enemy Within, Straight Talk About The Power And Defeat of Sin by Kris Lundgaard, published by P&R Publishing. My mind is already blown away, proving correct Richard Pratt Jr.'s words in the back of the book: "...will challenge you to radical spiritual transformation!" Lundgaard says in the preface that this book is co-authored so-to-speak with John Owen himself, that's how heavily it is influenced by John Owen's work on overcoming sin and temptation. I've been bogged down in Overcoming Sin & Temptation. There's a chance that I may allow my soul to be satisfied with Lundgaard's book instead. I want to always obey my husband when he instructs me by the words: "Do not let the perfect be the enemy of the good." It would do no good to have Owen just sitting there because I'm bogged down and paralyzed by it when God can use Lundgaard's work on my heart instead. I DO NOT need to prove my intellectual and theological prowess here. I just want to follow the Spirit's leading. For now, I'll leave it on the coffee table. Let's see what the Lord does.

How Good Sorrow And Pain Can Be

2011-11-28T07:33:00.000-07:00

The New Testament saints had letters written to them to remind them that when they suffered, they were sharing in a teeny tiny portion of Christ's suffering. They found comfort in that, they rejoiced in their hardships. We modern Americans, on the other hand, are always looking to ease ourselves, run away from the griefs. We have all sorts of ways to avoid such undesirable conditions, even in the church.

I have found in almost 42 years that the sorrows, griefs, pain, and burdens that bombarded my life during the years were the arrows that drove me to the Cross. It is not that these things are intrinsically good, it's that God uses them to drive us to him in ways that we would not have otherwise. We all suffer, we all have crosses. We must remember not to despise the way the Lord chooses to work in those around us. Instead we should remember that we are a living breathing body and when one member of that body hurts, the entire body hurts. Scripture says to "rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep." (Romans 12:15) God's word also exhorts us to be tenderhearted toward one another. The Lord uses the members of his body to work out his grace in the lives of his people.

Last week I was in a great deal of physical pain, day in and day out, it's very draining–this Fibromyalgia thing. Yes, indeed after a few days it starts to exhaust me mentally and spiritually also. It takes a deliberate effort to remind myself of the power of the Holy Spirit and the grace and mercies of Christ. But they are objectively true, even when they are veiled from my mind and heart. Pain, sorrows, griefs, burdens, depression, hardships of many types can do this to us. It veils the power, the love, the grace and mercies of our mighty God. And then the Holy Spirit brings to mind these words:

"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us." Romans 8:37

To which we cry out: "Show me your glory!"

Coming through these periods of hardships and being ministered to by the Holy Spirit, empowers us to lift our eyes off ourselves and turn to minister to others. We are then energized by the power of Christ to reach out and to be vessels for the work of God. It's true there are times when we are the weak ones, we are the ones receiving the help. But in those times, we most clearly realize that the help does not come from our own strength. And as the Lord lifts us from these valleys, we are to be willing participants with him to enter into the valley of others and bring refreshment, bring real tangible help–hands and feet that will do the ministering.

Sabbath Song, First Sunday of Advent

2011-11-27T00:25:00.000-07:00

Oh the glories of the coming season as we celebrate the birth, the incarnation of God in the flesh. Our Lord condescended to us, he took on flesh and blood to become man. What pride can we ever justify when our Savior humbled himself to the point that he did, and set up an example for us to follow:

"who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped," - Philippians 2:6

David Crowder Band doing an amazing job on their new Christmas album, Oh For Joy. Here they are doing "Oh Come, Oh Come Emmanuel."

The video here is boring but it's a pretty good compilation for this hymn: Come Though Long Expected Jesus.

I tried and tried to find a decent version of "Savior of the Nations, Come" but nothing has turned up that I feel comfortable putting on the blog. It's going to be a tough month...

My friend from Woman Never Sleeps wrote a post ruminating on our "unsettled" and "immature" hearts, pointing to a connection between a Spurgeon quote and this song, "Sigh No More" by Mumford and Sons:

What's Cooking

2011-11-26T09:44:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures of our Thanksgiving:

Making the cranberry orange chutney recipe I've developed over the last 14 years.

Had a hard time taking a decent picture of the finished product.

Making stuffed mushrooms, recipe came from a friend

Stuffed a combination of button white and baby portabella mushrooms

Creating the stuffing to go inside the turkey. Made with little Iraqi meatballs with an Iraqi blend of 7 spices, pine nuts and raisins.

The finished stuffing.

My 12 year old made her first apple pie. She did a great job. All the teens from our church got together in the home of one of the families and they all made apple pies together for their respective families. I love the way our church community nurtures our teens.

My turkey with the Iraqi rice stuffing. My Australian uncle taught me to rub the turkey down with olive oil and honey when he visited us last year. That is what gives it that beautiful caramelized color. Several years ago I did one with a molasses and honey mix; it ended up so dark in color that it scared half the guests from trying it.

The haricot verts turned out beautifully. Actually they were my favorite side dish this year.

I took the Trader Joe's cornbread stuffing and doctored it up. It was AWESOME! Even people who don't like stuffing were raving over it.

My sister made the mashed potatoes and I decorated them with chives. She did a great job!

I made a large pan of three different types of roasted squash. I have a recipe I developed when I was 20 years old.

My mother-in-law made Waldorf salad.

Thanksgiving Song

2011-11-24T05:00:00.000-07:00

What do we have that we did not receive from the hands of the Lord? We should not despise the providences of our God. Paul says in Romans 1:21 that when we don't honor God and are not thankful then our foolish hearts become darkened. Let us be a people with thanks on our lips.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God." Ephesians 2:8

"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his mercy (his steadfast love) endures forever." Psalm 136:1

The Thanksgiving Song for today is one of my favorite hymns: All Creatures of Our God and King and yes indeed the David Crowder Band sings it:

Give thanks for Jesus Christ! Where would we be without him?!

May you see the glory of Jesus

Being Deliberate About Thanksgiving

2011-11-23T15:29:00.000-07:00

Here's a great post from the Desiring God website: Making the Most of Turkey Time: Thanksgiving on Mission. If you're planning on spending any time with family during the upcoming holidays, this will be a good read. Especially if you have unbelieving family members, or nominal Christian families this is extra important. I have certainly had years when I have been the "self-righteous older brother." Frankly, it's ministries like Desiring God that have given me so much hope as a Christian woman. When I was all engulfed in the "Integrated-Family Movement" and it was all "Integrated-This" and "Integrated-That" I was a self-righteous, self-absorbed hypocrite. Yes, of course I want my children worshiping in church with me, that is good and true. But there's a difference between holding honest convictions in your heart and acting in ways that would qualify you for any other label except "integrated." Why is it those who claim that they are all about "Integration" (like I did) show such hostility and are usually the ones that segregate themselves from their brothers and sisters in Christ? Anyway, it's a beautiful thing to be able to show the spiritual fruit of longsuffering and gospel love to family and friends who may not always think the way you do about certain things.

Here's the one that got me:

5) Beware the self-righteous older brother in you.
For those who grew up in nonbelieving or in shallow or nominal Christian families, it can be too easy to slide into playing the role of the self-righteous older brother when we return to be around our families. Let’s ask God that he would enable us to speak with humility and patience and grace. Let’s remember that we’re sinners daily in need of his grace, and not gallop through the family gathering on our high horse as if we’ve arrived or just came back from the third heaven. Newman’s advice: “use the pronouns ‘we’ and ‘us’ far more than ‘you’” (65).

From Around The Web

2011-11-23T14:32:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of Black Friday deals from many Christian bookstores and institutions. For those who love to read, listen and grow, take a look at Black Friday & Cyber Monday 2011 Deals over at Challies' blog. When I say good deals, I mean GOOD DEALS!! Ligonier Ministries has some good stuff on sale for $5 this coming Friday. You can preview them here. Years ago, I remember buying "Consequences Have Ideas" on tape and it cost me a pretty penny. For $5 this is an amazing deal. Parents and pastors, this series, which is an overview of Western Philosophy, can be a great teaching tool for your own education or for kids in the upper high school years. Give those kids a great understanding of philosophy from a sound Biblical teacher like R.C. Sproul.

There is an excellent post over at Parchment & Pen by the title of "Why Do We Love C.S. Lewis and Hate Rob Bell? . I'm very grateful to my Pastor for introducing me to this blog. I have been learning, growing and benefiting much from it. A couple of days ago he wrote a short post, "The University Atmosphere" that might be of interest for parents as they talk to their children about this topic, and also those working at a secular institution or attending there.

And finally, there is a beautiful post by Kathleen Nielson over at the Gospel Coalition website. The title is "Wives Speak Out." The article is filled with answers from godly and productive Christian wives and mothers answering the question: How has your husband encouraged you to grow and use your gifts for the kingdom?

The last lady in that post has been married for 62 years. Here is her answer:

"In 1949 as John and I committed our lives together in marriage, I knew he was convinced of a clear calling from the Lord to ministry in the church. As we left college and seminary we were already serving together as a team. We were consciously striving to interpret 1 Peter 3 as our lives unfolded. Why would my husband, who prayed daily to be a faithful shepherd, not want to encourage me to use my gifts to further the goals the Lord had given us? Many exciting and challenging doors opened for me to serve alongside my husband in the church and community. After prayerful consideration John would encourage me to courageously walk through them. What a joy to teach different ages, help develop children and adult choirs, join in women's ministries, and often open our home for good fellowship. Over the years our love became even deeper as together we sought to train our daughters to grow to love and serve the Lord. The underlying strength and foundation of our home and work has always been God's Word and prayer together. John has truly been the spiritual leader in striving daily, throughout all these years, to read the Word and pray together. Now in our eighth decade as a team, what a blessing to begin each day reading the Bible aloud and praying for loved ones and needy ones around the world."- LaVon Buswell

Content Mothers

2011-11-21T06:56:00.000-07:00

It is the most blessed gift imaginable: To be content in the role of mother. I say this as a woman who has lived through years of discontentment (in all areas of life). We must acknowledge that contentment (in anything) is a work of grace by the Holy Spirit in the life of the believer. Ultimately, contentment comes when we reach the point where Jesus is enough. The fulfillment that we experience in any of our roles in life: Woman, wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, etc., are grounded in God. The key to being content in whatever position and station of life the Lord has us in, is being satisfied with God himself.

Is Christ enough for you, Christian friend? Do you look to any area of your life to find your identity? What we do as mothers is important, but we always have to keep in mind who we are. We are Christians first and foremost. Everything else in our lives flows from our position in Christ. If you want to be a more god-honoring wife, pursue Christ. If you want to be a wiser, more tender, and more gracious mother, pursue Christ. Pursue Christ! Pursue Christ, and he will pour out the grace needed to fulfill all he has called you to be.

So contentment is not found in the children, in the home, in the position of wife, in the workplace, in the hobbies, in the material goods, and so on. The contentment is found in Jesus. When our hearts and minds are rested and fulfilled with him, the grace and gift of contentment in all the above things will come. He will make your cup to run over.

Sabbath Song

2011-11-20T00:58:00.001-07:00

The grace that has seen me through many things. "Your Grace Is Enough" by Chris Tomlin

Hillsong United, "From The Inside Out"

Third Day and Brandon Heath singing the "Creed"

May you see the glory of Jesus

When Others Weep We Don't Hear

2011-11-18T06:15:00.000-07:00

My soft, comfortable, wasted salt of a middle class life sickens me sometimes. As I am working on a draft of the next post of "Biblical Motherhood" and the modern Evangelical model of being a "stay-at-home-mom," I am realizing how that model has the insidious effect of creating women so wrapped up in their own little lives that it renders them practically useless in the hands of the Savior. And NO I am not saying we abandon our children. But why do we always have to think in such extremes? Why is it when I am about to link to a heart wrenching story about modern slavery and girl trafficking there's a little voice in the back of my head that says: "Watch out, people are going to think you're saying women shouldn't stay home and take care of their children." And I say to that: "I rebuke you Satan, I don't write for man but for God."

We DO NOT abandon our covenant children to go on some crusade. But it's not an all or nothing game. This is what Satan wants us to think so that we do not do the work of God. There should be no fear in following Christ! Making our children our priority does not mean we make idols out of them.

So in light of that I recommend reading "The Face of Modern Slavery" an op-ed piece in the New York Times. I thank Tim Challies for that link. Of all the people in the world, it is us mothers that should be moved in our spirits over something like this. We are mothers, we are Christian mothers. There is something very powerful that we can do. We can pray! We can pray with genuineness, love, and humility. We can wage war through prayer. We can pray for the power of the Holy Spirit to destroy this evil.

Getting Out of the Cooking Slump

2011-11-17T10:12:00.000-07:00

I'm finally feeling like I'm coming out of this cooking slump I've been in. Everyone is happy about it, especially the family.

I grated apples for the first time in my life yesterday. It was wonderful! I couldn't believe how quickly they grated and how beautiful they looked. (Forgive the poor phone picture above.) I ran to my husband to tell him of my exciting experience.

The grated apples went into this simple oatmeal recipe I wanted to try. Our breakfasts had become dull and this looked like a promising lift to plain old oatmeal. There's some milk and a touch of butter in there also. I drizzled honey over my bowl. Yummy!

I took the time to make myself a tuna salad sandwich on a mini croissant instead of inhaling whatever is lying around.

The following pictures are me trying to create a French-Iraqi fusion. I took my mother's stove-top chicken curry recipe (different and distinct from Luma's chicken curry which I created some years back) and experimented with a French layered braising technique. This, by the way, is somewhat similar to the Hungarian dish of Chicken Paprikash, which I haven't made in years because my husband doesn't like it.

Starting out with the chicken thighs covered with curry and kosher salt. (Yes, it DOES matter what kind of curry you use.) Braise for a while.

And this step is exactly where I made my mistake, I realized later after going over the recipe in my mind. Without thinking through the technique I layered the potatoes and onions raw. I ought to have sautéed them first. Next time, in a pan on the side, I'll sauté the onion and the potatoes separately with a touch of salt and curry.

Here it is after it had simmered for a while.

A pot of Basmati rice to go with the curry.

I ran out of ALL the good cheeses I had in the refrigerator the other day but I didn't let that stop me from making a mushroom quiche. I went ahead and just used cheddar. I read that the French actually have quiche for dinner and not breakfast so I thought I would try it that way. We had it with a cup of tea, along with the following salad I created:

The other day I cut up some tomatoes, put some goat cheese on top, drizzled with olive oil and finished it with sea salt and freshly ground pepper. As I was eating, I thought how nice it might be to have some warm walnuts on top. And then I remembered the walnut oil my husband had bought for me as a gift (which I've neglected during my cooking rut). One thing led to another and I decided to create the salad you see above. That's a French walnut vinaigrette drizzled over the tomatoes and spinach.

I am NOT a good soup maker, but I am determined to become one. This was my first try at a French vegetable soup recipe:

Here I am "sweating" the vegetables.

The recipe called for the potatoes, onions and garlic to be boiled separately.

Everything together in the pot.

Finished the soup with a touch of ground nutmeg and a dollop of sour cream (I don't usually keep créme fraîche on hand, but I may just start).

Book Update

2011-11-17T08:53:00.000-07:00

A couple of days ago I finished John Stott's The Cross of Christ. I'm also almost finished with Unfashionable by Tchividjian and looking forward to writing a post about some things it's got me thinking about. My husband was right, it's excellent.

Biblical Motherhood; Cultural and Contextual Misunderstandings Part 1

2011-11-16T22:59:00.000-07:00

I'm working on a series of short posts on the topic of Biblical motherhood and how I have come to think that the way the Evangelical church has approached this hot topic has become impotent.

Does our modern American culture encourage Biblical motherhood? No, it certainly doesn't. It has its own ideas of motherhood and they are all skewed. Does the Christian community encourage Biblical motherhood? That is a tougher question to answer. First, we need to acknowledge that not all Christian circles think alike on this issue. Moreover, the different sections of the Church that do encourage motherhood, in my opinion don't always understand what they are supporting and how to help the women (besides publishing more books on the topic). In the end, I am finding that the issue among Christians is almost always discussed from only two positions (like the Democrat vs. Republican polarity) either you are a mother who stays home and does not work, or you are a career woman. But where is that in the text of Scripture? Where is that division in the culture of the Bible? Where do we find that kind of separation in the context of the Bible? I believe this dichotomy is false and is one of the reasons we are not reaching our culture for Christ. Nor, for that matter, are we truly building up the souls of those women who are at home "full time."

I want to say at the outset that I DO think that a Christian woman's first priority should be her husband and her children, if she has either of those. It's true some women have been helped by some of the books written on motherhood, but our culture in general and the Evangelical church in particular is still struggling heavily with this issue. Why? I believe it is because in modern American conservative Christian circles the paradigm we have been promoting is that of the nuclear family of the 1950's and not the more Biblical idea of households and communities. Our language (for the most part) calls men and women to the idea that a stay-at-home-mother should look and act like the sterile June Cleaver and other stereotypes of that era. Then we wonder why more women are not leaving their jobs to stay home with their children and why those at home need daily, if not hourly, reminders to "count it all joy." We have been pursuing the wrong model.

If it were possible to ask Sarah, Rebekkah, Ruth, The Proverbs 31 woman, or Mary the mother of Jesus: "Are you a stay-at-home-mom?" What would be their answers? More importantly, what would be the looks on their faces? They would have no concept of this 20th century position label. Work was a part of life for these women, like water or air. No woman (except the very rich) could imagine a life without work. I don't think I need to do an entire historical and economic timeline to show that women have always worked. But we find ourselves in a completely different economic structure in the modern world. There is wisdom in the model that, with regard to home economics, the husband plays offense, and the wife plays defense, but that metaphor is limited. Did the Proverbs 31 woman limit herself to "playing defense?"

So how do we go about this? What does wisdom say? Ecclesiastes says there is nothing new under the sun. In spite of the fact that we live in modern homes with modern comforts and an economic system that is vastly different from that of Biblical times, there are some things that don't change: People. We may have fancy machines that can wash our clothes and wash our dishes but we are still man. Therefore, I want to spend the next few posts exploring a new paradigm. A Hegelian synthesis of our current life and society with the models that the church has offered women in the last few decades.

Let us consider a paradigm that can stand up to the modern idols of our culture. More importantly, since the target audience is Christian women, a paradigm that will glorify Jesus Christ and topple down the idols in our own hearts.

Words That Crush And Words That Heal

2011-11-15T13:12:00.000-07:00

I remember how these words pierced me last year, but I also remember how they were the beginning of my healing:

"We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. Any why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother's righteous. Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you. We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death. Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him." - 1 John 3:12-15

Cooking French Again

2011-11-15T10:34:00.000-07:00

Four years ago I discovered Thomas Keller and French cookery and I fell in love. That was difficult for an anglophile. After all, my conscience cried, I'm British at heart. It felt like a betrayal. (If you remember the warring history between Britain and France you'll understand what I'm talking about.) Ever so slowly francophilia has been creeping into my heart and home. But I don't feel guilty anymore! I see it instead as a picture of what it will look like in the end, when we are all with Christ. The many nations, the eclecticity, it is all brought into the Kingdom in the beautiful union we will have with Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Who can begin to image what the cuisine will be like at the Supper of the Lamb?!

I was remembering yesterday that I didn't even know what an American Thanksgiving sweet potato casserole was until I had it for the first time at the age of 22. And yet most of the people around me have grown up with it all their lives. So where am I going with all this? When in my early twenties I started having more "American" foods, it opened me up to wanting to know what all other national cuisines were like. Most of my life up till then we ate Arabic food at home. When we lived in Greece we ate Greek food, for the most part because it was so very similar to what my mother already knew how to cook. However, once we came to America, it was very difficult for my mother to assimilate her cooking. Mostly because she and my dad didn't care for what is considered "American" cuisine.

I have come to terms with the fact that I am a woman of many seasons, that I am eclectic. I don't fight it anymore. I have more to say on all this and how our theology works itself out even in our cooking. For now, here's how I've been bringing art to my weeknight kitchen:

Last week I made this Asparagus Quiche with Compté cheese. Probably the best quiche I've ever made.

Last night's dinner:

A simple side dish of sautéed mushrooms and onions. I usually use shallots but I didn't have any on hand.

My simple weeknight version of Potatoes Lyonnaise

I am learning how delightfully quick a meal centered on a broiled fillet is. This is Tilapia with olive oil, coarse salt and tarragon. Towards the end, I sprinkled some Parmesan and set it back under the broiler. Parmesan is a dry cheese, it browns beautifully.

For dessert we had Pear Clafoutis without dough and a scoop of vanilla bean ice cream. I had made the clafoutis on Sunday and it was good, but the whole family agreed that it had developed more depth overnight. It was just luscious. That's how we learn.

A Word From Spurgeon

2011-11-14T08:31:00.000-07:00

We were invited to a friends house for dessert last night. I saw the following quote from Spurgeon in their house and was determined to get a copy of it. The Lord continues to confirm this message to us:

"If I have any message to give from my own bed of sickness, it would be this—if you do not wish to be full of regrets when you are obliged to lie still, work while you can. If you desire to make a sick bed as soft as it can be, do not stuff it with mournful reflections that you wasted time while you were in health and strength. People said to me years ago, 'You will break your constitution down with preaching ten times a week,' and the like. Well, if I have done so I am glad of it. I would do the same again. If I had fifty constitutions I would rejoice to break them down in the service of the Lord Jesus Christ. You young men that are strong, overcome the wicked one and fight for the Lord while you can. You will never regret having done all that lies in you for our blessed Lord and master. Crowd as much as you can into every day, and postpone no work till tomorrow. 'Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with all thy might.'" -Charles Spurgeon, 1876

No Jane Austen idleness for our family. There's a life to be lived and work to be done. We're to overcome the world, not hide out from it.

Sabbath Song

2011-11-13T06:00:00.000-07:00

I was starting to get tired of linking to the Sabbath Songs with advertisements plastered all over the You Tube page, so my husband taught me how to imbed the videos. I don't think I want to do this for each one. Let's see how it works.

The first Sabbath Song this week is "Savior Please" by Josh Wilson.

Many times this week I have needed to preach the gospel to myself by reminding myself that I am forgiven. Sanctus Real "Forgiven"

"How Deep The Father's Love For Us" by Skillet

May you see the glory of Jesus

The Cross of Christ

2011-11-10T15:16:00.001-07:00

The reading group over at Challies' Blog is almost done with The Cross of Christ. Actually we finished the last chapter today. There is a small conclusion which I'm assuming we are to read on our own.

This last chapter is on suffering, a subject dear to me. A part of the chapter that intrigued me was the discussion on Jesus maturing through pain and suffering. Stott writes:

"If suffering was the means by which the sinless Christ became mature, we in our sinfulness need it that much more. Significantly, James uses the same language of 'perfection' or 'maturity' in relation to Christians. Just as suffering led to maturity through obedience for Christ, so it leads to maturity through perseverance for us." -John Stott, The Cross of Christ

My First Catering Job

2011-11-10T09:14:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I delivered my first catering job, a company lunch for 50 people. I received a very encouraging email from the CEO of the company later in the afternoon asking me to think about doing it again some time.

I was stressed over the situation last week, but to my surprise I found myself calm once I started working. In the end I really enjoyed the process and that feeling of accomplishment when all was done and delivered on time with hot things hot and cold things cold. The pictures were taken with a phone not the camera so the quality is low.

The Menu:

Luma's Chicken Curry (an original recipe I created off of the traditional Iraqi curry)
Beef Kabob
Basal U Sumac
Rice
Khubiz
Hummus
Baba Ghanouj
Middle Eastern pickle tray with feta cheese
Middle Eastern Salad with dressing

Mothers Have Power

2011-11-08T07:21:00.000-07:00

Mothers have the power to kill or to give life
Mothers have the power to starve or to feed
Mothers have the power to neglect or nourish
Mothers have the power to deprive or pour affection
Mothers have the power to be cold or to touch
Mothers have the power to build or to tear down
Mothers have the power to speak with a sharp tongue or a soft tongue
Mothers have the power to withhold wisdom or to impart it with longsuffering
Mothers have the power to run away or to endure
Mothers have the power of themselves or of Jesus Christ

Which powers do you use?
You have a choice.
You have power over eternal souls.

The Cross of Christ, Peacemaking

2011-11-06T22:19:00.000-07:00

We're in the second to the last chapter in The Cross of Christ reading group over at Challies' blog. This week's chapter was on loving our enemies and peacemaking. I've said before in public and in private that my husband is my role model in this area. The verse:

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God." Matthew 5:9

I would say is a good description of him.

Girls Wrestling Boys

2011-11-06T22:12:00.000-07:00

My pastor linked to this last week, but I didn't get a chance to read it until just now. Pastor John Piper writing on Girls Wrestling Boys. I would say it applies to any sport where they have boys and girls competing in physical ways.

Sabbath Song

2011-11-06T00:47:00.000-07:00

It's been a tough week, but I'm glad to share one of my favorite songs. Two of the lines of this song: "The one the winds and waves obey" and "You're not far from grace," comfort me. In a week when I have had times of feeling very far from his grace, this song reminds me that my God is the one that the winds and waves obey, and that I'm not far from his grace. Strong Enough To Save by Tenth Avenue North.

There are things in life that are hard to let go, but we must when Christ asks us to. Let It Go by Tenth Avenue North.

Hallelujah by Tenth Avenue North. What a beautiful song. Yes indeed, through the Lord's providence it is turning into a Tenth Avenue North morning.

So I could have linked to Andrea Bocelli singing The Lord's Prayer with the Mormon Tabernacle choir, but I thought: NOT! There are enough Mormon commercials out there. Here is something that is Orthodox, a song based on the Apostle's Creed, and it includes The Lord's Prayer. Manifesto by The City Harmonic.

This isn't usually the type of song I would post on Sunday morning for Sabbath Song. I'm doing it because it touched me and I never know who out there could be helped by a song like this. It is a song about brokenness and how we can love and uphold each other through relationships. Oh My Dear by Tenth Avenue North.

May you see the glory of Jesus

Enthralled By God's Designs

2011-11-02T07:24:00.000-07:00

After years of using dishes that were either gifts given to us, or strictly utilitarian, we finally decided to invest in a set of dishes that bring beauty to our home. I think God had us wait until this season in life, when our tastes and priorities are where they are, to show us this:

That's the picture from the Crate and Barrel website. It took all of 5 seconds of looking at that photo for Geoff and I to agree that this was the one.

That's another one from the website. The pattern is called "Classic Century," and it is a re-issue of a 60-year old design. The designer's name is Eva Zeisel she is 104 years old and is still working as a designer. How wonderful is that?! Finally, the dishes were made in England, which is the icing on the cake for me as an anglophile.

We haven't gotten a complete set yet, just 8 place settings and a few service items:

I particularly love how the bowls, and even the plates, are round, but not quite circular.

Quick Book Update

2011-11-01T15:45:00.000-07:00

Sometimes while reading a book we find in our spirit that it is not the season for it. And so, I have put aside Because He Loves Me for the time being. I will most certainly get back to it, but not for a little while.

I picked up the Steve Jobs biography yesterday and started reading it. As Challies said in his post, some of this stuff is going to take a while to sink in. I'm sure I'll have some thoughts to write on as I get deeper into it.

A book on the horizon (hopefully within this week) will be Wendy Alsup's By His Wounds You Are Healed, how the message of Ephesians transforms a woman's identity. I really want to finish the attributes of God in Systematic Theology before I start Alsup's Ephesians study. I need to be able to give it my full attention.

There really is a method to my madness. In my self-imposed theological studies I have short term goals and long term goals. They are in an order which I believe the Lord is directing in a tangible and unmistakeable way, ergo the laying aside of Because He Loves Me.

Books, Music, Evening Gowns and Giorgio Armani Suits

2011-11-01T10:11:00.000-07:00

"Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3: 3-4

In the "Gospel Amnesia" series (most of which can be found in the month of July) I talked about what happens to us as Christians when we forget the gospel and live our lives like "Yup, got that down, now what's next...." One of the areas I want to explore further concerns the outward adorning of Christian women. We know what inward beauty is supposed to look like:

"but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:4

The beauty that is precious, prized and treasured in the eyes of God is the gentle quiet spirit of a Christian woman. That is, the fullness of manifestation of the Holy Spirit within a woman. Matthew Henry's Commentary says specifically "the graces and virtues of God's Holy Spirit." Moreover, it says "... but the grace of God, the longer we wear it, the brighter and better it is." There is an outward consequence to all this, of course. Obedience to Christ in ALL things entails obedience to what he says about our bodies etc. Although we are not to fall into vanity and idolatry of our bodies, our clothing, and outward beauty, we are to care about the image of Christ the world sees in us. Furthermore, Jesus Christ is not a Gnostic, our God is very much into material things. He is the Creator. The God who created rain drops, ants, strawberries and beautiful women like Sarah and Rebecca certainly cares about outward beauty. He is NOT a utilitarian. This by the way, is something that can be seen in the common grace God has on the unbelieving world. When I look at the beauty and ingenuity of the products that Steve Jobs created, I see the wondrous workings of God.

Many times I forget the gospel and its power and relevance to my every day life, I fall into the deception that beauty should for the most part only be inward. But going after holiness without gospel eyes only produces arrogance and ugliness, inside and out. When I was young, I had the hots for Georgio Armani suits and spent many years pouring over Vogue. As I grew older, I was determined to be "godly" in this area, so I fed my disdain for beautiful things and cultivated a judgmental heart. Where did that get me? Anytime we allow Satan to deceive us in these ways we can usually expect some kind of wake up call from God.

So what should we look like as Christian women? What is that balanced standard that will stop us from falling either into the idolatry of body and clothing or the idolatry of wanting everyone to know how godly we are by how "modest" (frumpy) we look. The answer is Jesus! The answer is the gospel! While keeping the gospel before our eyes we pray for Christ's humility and meekness. And as the Lord pours his grace and virtues in us we look in the mirror and determine to be beautiful for the Lord and for our husbands (if we're married). We put on some make-up and some earrings. Maybe we'll need a haircut, something stylish. We dress as Matthew Henry says, according to our station in life. Most importantly, we dress for the occasion. I won't be going to the symphony in the clothes I wear to go to the grocery store, and so on and so forth.

I love books, music and evening gowns and I have a lot of all of them. I believe I am finally able to enjoy these gifts from the Lord without the sense of shame and self-deprecation I used to have. And as for the Armani suit I used to covet, well now I've got two of them. And here they are:

These little guys are amazing.

When We Act Like Steve Jobs, At His Worst

2011-10-31T10:38:00.000-07:00

So what can I possibly say about Steve Jobs? Nothing really. Who am I after all? I am an ordinary woman who through God's calling desires to live life as Christ: A servant. A servant who inspires to do the work he created me to do with excellence and effectiveness.

This is a small part of what Tim Challies says about Steve Jobs. He (Challies) has inspired me to go out and get that biography and read it NOW:

"He will forever be known as a great innovator and a man who lived at the crossroads between the humanities and the sciences. In his own field and in his own way, he sought to make the world a better place. But he did so at the expense of so many people whom he left abandoned and brutalized. It’s like he cared for humanity but not for humans, for mankind but not for individuals."

That last part had me gripped: "It’s like he cared for humanity but not for humans, for mankind but not for individuals." This is the opposite of our triune God and of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, who not only cares for humanity/mankind, but loves humans and individuals at a deep personal level. And then it hit me: So many of us as Christians talk about loving "people" but do we love the individuals (Christian or not, family or not) that God brings to us throughout our lives?

We claim to be sons and daughters of our heavenly Father but we act more like Steve Jobs who embraced Zen Buddhism.

Sabbath Song, Reformation Sunday

2011-10-30T06:53:00.000-07:00

What is more appropriate on Reformation Sunday than Martin Luther's A Mighty Fortress Is Our God?! First is a German rendition, Ein Feste Burg Ist Unser Gott for my friend Jo. Next, A Mighty Fortress Is Our God, in English.

This is a new hymn written by Douglas Bond, the author of one of our favorite read-aloud series, "Crown and Covenant" (the book series beginning with "Duncan's War.") Creator God, Our Sovereign Lord. The words are based on the five Solas of the Reformation.

This is one of the songs we sing in parts at our church. Here is Christ Church Moscow singing O Sing A New Song To The Lord. I love the xylophone and the cello!

For The Love Of M.A.C.

2011-10-28T22:20:00.000-07:00

The first time I heard of M.A.C. cosmetics was from a co-worker at the age of 22/23 when I was a dental assistant/front office manager. My question to her was "I love your make-up, wow, what do you have on?"

Her answer was: "M.A.C."

I spent a goodly amount of years being absolutely repulsed by advertising when I did my pendulum swing of "I am NOT of this world." Watching "Mad Men" and subsequently a documentary on advertising, added to the work of grace the Lord has been kneading into my heart, has helped me to think a lot more about the ontology of advertising. It doesn't revolt me, it makes me think and ask questions and helps me talk to my kids about things.

M.A.C. does some pretty fantastical advertising, to say the least, and there is plenty of room for more negative value judgments about their marketing image as well. When you go to a M.A.C. store or the M.A.C. counter at the high end department stores, you don't see your average woman with the line of make-up that she's trying to sell you (painted as best as she could) on her face. What you see is a complete exaggeration, a fantasy. You see the unreal, the make-believe and the illusion of things. But I contend that M.A.C. is actually being more honest in their advertising then some of the other companies. The distance between the customers' real life and the image is so great, no one is fooled into thinking they are going to be the M.A.C. model.

Furthermore, am I going to boycott a company and not give them my $22 because they have a man with make-up on as part of their advertisement? No! Why? What would that solve? Talk about petty Christianity. Is that really the image of Christ we want to give to this culture? What has boycotting companies ever done but make Christians look foolish and spiteful. Christians who boycott companies that don't do things the way they want are acting EXACTLY like the world. The message of boycott is always: "If you do something my way then I'll do something for you." Ummm.... is that the message of Christ? Does Christ ever say "if you do things my way then I'll do something for you." what about:

"but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

Jesus dined with people who probably looked like they had M.A.C. on. He reached out to them but he did not enter into their sin. I am convinced that the reason he had so many undesirables come to him is because they experienced his Holy love "while they were still sinners." There are so many times when I am undesirable, and yet the grace of my God convicts me and comforts me all at once.

Yes, I use M.A.C. Not exclusively, and not in any way like their advertising fantasies, but I use their make-up and I LOVE it. It is a BEAUTIFUL product. The fact that my husband loves me in it is also a driving force, of course.

So, here is the Pro Longwear Lipcolour that I bought today:

Umm, yeah, it's called "Lasting Lust," so there's that marketing of sin thing, but I'm not afraid of that bogey man. The name of my lipstick is NOT going to make me go out and lust. If I'm going to fall into that particular sin it will be because of my heart, not my lipstick. After all, that is exactly where Jesus said our sins come from. Do we know better than him?

Excellent Post On Halloween

2011-10-28T11:56:00.000-07:00

This is probably the best article I've read on Halloween in a very long time. Sent Into The Harvest: Halloween on Mission is from John Piper's Desiring God website. My hope and prayer is that this blog post will help many many Christians in this country to re-think their stance on Halloween, please read it. No naïveté and no retreat!

Pride Brings Anxiety

2011-10-26T06:19:00.000-07:00

The book of 1 Peter is a beautiful book about submission, humility and exhortation to love, hope, suffer with a right heart attitude and the grace of God in all these areas of life. 1 Peter 5:5-7 says:

"...Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for 'God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.' Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you."

When our hearts are full of pride, they become anxious over many things. That is, we become anxious over ALL those things that we are being prideful about. In Jeremiah 17:9 God says, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?"We may not always recognize that some of those things we "worry" or are "concerned" about may actually be entangled with pride in our hearts.

So I see this as a good test for our hearts. Think about the things that make you anxious/worried/apprehensive/worked up/bothered/fearful/troubled/disturbed and then work backwards to find if the root of that anxiety is pride. In the verses above, the Lord commands us to humble ourselves with one another and with him; to hand over all our anxieties to him in submission to his care and sovereignty, trusting in his control and plans, not ours.

I love that verse 5 says "clothe yourselves... with humility." The idea is to cover or envelop ourselves completely with humility. We are to be so covered with Christ's humility that this is all that people see when looking at us. We are to put on the meekness and humility of Christ in such a way that we are protected, shielded, and hidden beneath him.

Aesthetic Pleasure

2011-10-25T22:50:00.000-07:00

I've decided to add a category of posts called "Aesthetic Pleasure." That is the pleasure derived from beauty. Our God loves his creation. I am constantly amazed at the beauty and glory of it all.

I knew I liked green and gray and that has been "in" lately, but oh my I think I'm falling in love with yellow and gray. Especially when they look like this.

Preschoolers and Peace

2011-10-24T19:01:00.000-07:00

Okay, the only reason I'm doing this is because Kendra is my friend. Kendra is this amazing homeschooling mother of 8 (she graduated her oldest last year) and she runs a GREAT website called "Preschoolers and Peace." Right now she's got a give away going on, several day planners and subscriptions to Home Educating Family Magazines. She happens to love organization and planners and such. Her website has a wealth of information on it and it's NOT just for families with preschoolers, it's for families with kids of all ages. Kendra loves the Lord Jesus first and foremost. She is a speaker sometimes at homeschooling conferences around the Bay area, she writes for a homeschool magazine, and she has won awards for her blog. Although she's been homeschooling for over 18 years and it would be tempting for someone like that to rely on self, but she knows in whom she has believed. Her post "Has Your Hope Shifted" is a good reminder to all of us no matter what schooling method we use.

Grown Daughters, On Being The Mother Of An Eighteen Year Old

2011-10-24T12:13:00.000-07:00

This post may meander a bit, but stick with it:

Eighteen years ago this morning I held my first baby in my arms and tried to nurse her. She came at 8:35 AM on a Sunday morning after an all night labor. We had decided not to find out the sex of the baby when I was pregnant with her so we were just getting to know her and getting used to the fact that we had a daughter. She was tiny, barely over 5 lbs. But she was perfect, and she was born during my favorite season of the year, the Fall.

Parenthood is like childhood in a way, you grow up into it. It is NOT an all-size-fits-all. There is no arrival! And there are NO better rules to parent and live by then the ones Jesus gave and which tend to be the ones we forget: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and strength; and love your neighbor as yourself. Our closest neighbors as parents are our children. How come is it that we easily remember the "don't do this and the don't do that" but we forget the two commandments Jesus said were the greatest? Where would our parenting be if we were mindful of and practiced what Jesus says. I write all this in order to say that with each passing year the Lord is gracious to teach us how to parent our children, he grows us as he grows them.

My eighteen year old daughter has been very gracious and longsuffering with me. As the oldest she got all the raw, naive, and/or ignorant parenting. Parents tend to be the hardest on their oldest, usually that's who they're learning with. And boy howdy did I have a lot to learn as a parent. I also spent some time being a single parent; her dad and I divorced. She had to learn to navigate those waters with me also. For 18 years now she's been my oldest "traveling buddy" and she has done well. Yes, there's so much I would do differently, but my God is sovereign over all things and I know that he will use all of my parenting (the good and the bad) to make her the woman he wants her to be.

Some time last year I told my daughter that there were no more rules, no more restrictions, no more anything, there was only one thing and one thing only that I expected her to do: Live her life sold out to Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior. And yes, I even told her she didn't need to obey me anymore, she just needed to follow Jesus. Now, I know some parents may cringe at this but hear me out. Who are our children? They are eternal souls created by the God of this universe. He hands them over as babies and charges us to be good and faithful stewards of them. We DO NOT OWN our children. They are his. We have them for a blink of an eye. The Lord gives us one rule and one rule only and we want to twist even this:

"Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." Deuteronomy 6:4-7

I will humbly admit that there was a time when I read that verse and believed it was a mandate from the lips of God to homeschool only. What?! This is the living God instructing parents to teach their children to love the Lord their God with all their heart, with all their soul and with all their might. Do we want anything for our children more than we want them to love Jesus Christ? Well, usually what it comes down to is that we want the control. We want to control what our children like or don't like, we want to control where they go, who they talk to, what they read, who and when to marry, schooling options, career options, etc. etc. etc. Some of us parents really need to come face to face with our own sin. That is, we want control of our children or we want to live vicariously through our own children. This is NOT the way of the Lord. They are not ours. When they are young we do control their surroundings and we are to use that control wisely for the purpose of training them to love the Lord and to serve him. But as they get older we are supposed to, as in the words of Doug Wilson, take the training wheels off and let them go. They are to be taught wisdom and the fear of the Lord. Then armed with these, we are to let them go so that they can serve God and establish their own relationship with him. The Lord is the author and finisher of their faith, just as he is for ours. (I think I want to spend more time on this issue, but in a later post.)

So today my oldest celebrates her 18th birthday, and I get to celebrate 18 years of parenting. She has many many more years to come as she grows up into a woman. And I have, God willing, many more years to parent. For the younger children it's still a lot of parenting time, for her the relationship is morphing. Although we remain mother and daughter, but for all eternity we get to be sisters in Christ. How glorious is that! I am excited to see what God has planned for her. My daughter is beautiful, incredibly bright and intelligent, and most importantly she has a heart for serving others. My one and only prayer is that she will take all that she is and lay it at the feet of Jesus and love and serve the Lord her God with all her heart, with all her soul and with all her might. We both still have a lot of growing and maturing ahead of us. This is good and right, this is how we will be conformed to the image of Christ. Come Lord Jesus, fill us with your Holy Spirit.

I love you...

"But Who's Going To Make The Wine?"

2011-10-23T07:21:00.000-07:00

Some of us ladies at church rotate making the communion bread. My oldest son (4) is enthralled looking at things with the magnifying glass. As he makes his way to the kitchen this morning:

Me: You can look at the bread but don't get too close, I don't want you to touch it because it's for communion.

Son: Did you make it for church?

Me: Yup, it's for church.

Son: But who's going to make the wine?

Sabbath Song

2011-10-23T06:26:00.000-07:00

Having read chapter 10 of The Cross of Christ, I spent some time thinking about and anticipating the Lord's Supper this morning (which is every Sunday morning at our church). This in turn made me think it would be good and right to post one of my favorite communion songs: This is the Feast of Victory, the words are taken straight from Revelation 5. One of the reasons why I love this song is because it proclaims Christ's victory. There are so many Christians out there that live defeated lives, I have a heart for these people. Just as the Lord calls certain people to be evangelists (of course we are all proclaimers of the gospel by our words and deeds) and specifically gifts them in that way, that's the sense of burden I have for struggling Christians. If you want to sing along, here are the words:

This is the feast of victory for our God.
Alleluia, Alleluia, Alleluia!

Worthy is Christ, the Lamb who was slain,
Whose blood set us free to be people of God.

Power, riches and wisdom and strength,
And honor and blessing and glory are his.

Sing with all the people of God
And join in the hymn of all creation.

Blessing and honor and glory and might
Be to God and the Lamb forever. Amen.

For the Lamb who was slain
has begun his reign. Alleluia.

Our family has a special place in our hearts for Switchfoot, ever since our good friends back in California introduced us to them almost 8 years ago. My husband took the girls to the Switchfoot concert on Friday night, and they had a great time. In honor of that, here's "On Fire". (I LOVE this song!!!) At the concert, they opened with "Mess of Me," which along with "Ammuniton" and "The War Inside" really show in their songwriting an understanding of the universal, cultural, and individual human brokenness that result from original sin. There are numerous examples of redemption and hope in their song catalog of course, but it's actually encouraging, in a Jonathan Edwards sort of way, to hear songs of the hopelessness of our own strength, and the groaning of creation under the curse.

May you see the glory of Jesus.

The Cross of Christ

2011-10-21T07:16:00.000-07:00

We're on chapter 10 "The Community of Celebration" in The Cross of Christ. Oh what a chapter! One of the best quotes was in the first paragraph:

"Thus the very purpose of his self-giving on the cross was not just to save isolated individuals, and so perpetuate their loneliness, but to create a new community whose members would belong to him, love one another and eagerly serve the world. This community of Christ would be nothing less than a renewed and reunited humanity, of which he as the second Adam would be head."

I actually didn't expect him to go into a full discussion of the Lord's Supper, but I'm so glad he did. I feel like I have a better grasp of the Canons of the Council of Trent and the differences between the Roman Catholic theology of the Lord's Supper and that of the Reformers. Far from this being just head knowledge, I rejoice in the deeper and fuller understanding because I know this coming Sunday when we celebrate the Lord's Supper it will come alive for me in a more powerful way. I loved this:

"In fact, the whole life of the Christian community should be conceived as a festival in which with love, joy and boldness we celebrate what God has done for us through Christ. In this celebration we find ourselves caught up in the worship of heaven, so that we join 'with angels and archangels, and with all the company of heaven' in giving God glory. And because the worship of God is in essence the acknowledgment of his worth, we unite with the heavenly chorus in singing of his worthiness as both Creator and Redeemer:

You are worthy, our Lord and God,
to receive glory and honor and power,
for you created all things,
and by your will they were created and have their being. (Rev 4:11)

Worthy is the Lamb, who was slain,
to received power and wealth and wisdom and strength
and honor and glory and praise! (Rev 5:12)

Boys Should Grow Up Into Men

2011-10-17T12:41:00.000-07:00

I have two boys and we have certain parenting goals and expectations of them. One of those expectations is that one day they will become men: Courageous, God-loving, God-serving grown men. Unfortunately, because of our culture's attitudes and encouragements towards perpetual adolescence of boys, I've seen something of what I believe is an un-Biblical over-correction on the part of some groups in the church today. We don't need to take a verse like Psalm 144:12 which says:

"May our sons in their youth be like plants full grown, our daughters like corner pillars cut for the structure of a palace" Psalm 144:12

and turn it into a battle cry for "training" our boys to be men by the age of 15. Or, for that matter, to use that verse for laying on some other "circumcision" in order to be "a godly young man." First, we need to remember that the work of God in the individual lives of our boys is on his timetable not ours. Second, we should never compare and contrast our sons with other people's sons, the Lord gives each boy a different calling and a different set of gifts and weaknesses. And third, our ultimate goal for our sons should be that they will be imitators of Christ himself and be conformed to his image more and more as the years go on. As a matter of fact, for us personally, although we have some short term and long term goals for all our children, our biggest desire is to see them grow into men and women that are wholeheartedly sold out to Jesus Christ, loving him and living a life in service to him and for his glory.

Our number one job is modeling Biblical manhood and womanhood roles in the home. This is what is going to make the biggest impact on them and what will bring them to proper maturity. Because in the end what it comes down to is what they see in the home. Do they see dad being like Christ in the home, on the job, in the church, with his wife, with his hobbies, with the children, with all other duties a man may hold? Do they see mom being like Christ in the home, in the church, with her husband, with her hobbies, with the children, with all other duties that a woman may hold including a job if that is what the Lord called that family to?

Here's the small post entitled "Neither Boys Nor Men-Our Calling In This Cultural Crisis" from the Desiring God website that got me thinking about all this business.

Pictures

2011-10-17T11:46:00.000-07:00

I LOVE how easy the new blogger interface posts pictures. Finally, it won't be such a time consuming drag to get some on the blog. I was also clicking on some of the pictures in the post below and noticed the nifty little way I get a bigger image and all the pictures are in smaller windows at the bottom so I can go through them like a slideshow. Good job Blogger!!

Moved In

2011-10-17T09:23:00.000-07:00

We've been in our new digs for one week now and loving it. The house is in a suburb of Phoenix. It really is so nice to be back in town. We were talking how the house and small neighborhood feel like city living even though it's a suburb. I had some requests for what the new place looks like so I decided to go ahead and post some pictures:

Front of the house. It's called a zero lot line house. They are not attached to each other but are separated by their respective patios.

View from our front porch and from the tiny office and the girls room upstairs

Behind the trees and our cars just across the street from the house is a cute tiny park and playground

Same scene, but a wide angle panorama of our front porch view

The new kitchen

The living room. We condensed our books and slimmed down from seven bookshelves to the three shown in the pictures. There are many many boxes of books in the garage, labeled for when we need them. The couch and loveseat were a gift from my parents and sister.

The windows show the side patio. Forgot to take a picture.

A view of the entire downstairs area. The trees and mountain view are visible from the dining room and living room also.

The piano and the side door that goes out to the patio

The dining room

The upstairs is all done also, except for tons of laundry and the tiny "office" area. I'll try to remember to take a few pictures some time this week.

Sabbath Song

2011-10-16T00:40:00.000-07:00

Well, I've known for a long time that the words to this song are true, I've even lived it-you can say all the right things as a Christian, but in the end what does it all mean. This is Feel It In Your Heart by Abandon. I have my husband to thank for discovering this band. I love our journey together and all the eclectic music that we love. We're in the process of creating a music corner in our bedroom: Keyboard, bass guitar, electric guitar, flute, and ukulele. The acoustic guitar is downstairs in the living room, along with the piano.

We've had an amazing journey through this move, the Lord has made so many things beautiful in our lives, yes even the hard providences have become beautiful in our eyes. Here is Beautiful Beautiful by Francesca Battistelli.

Another great song by Abandon: Hero

I would like to end today's Sabbath Song post with a song I've heard a few times but have had mixed feelings about. I remember the first time or two I didn't really like it; I thought it was too man-centered. But I kept getting this nagging question: Luma, why don't you like it? My answer was that I don't like songs that talk about God loving us as we are, sinful and all. I felt crushed and convicted as soon as the realization hit me: "but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8. I have struggled and do struggle SO deeply with this. But thinking it over, I knew I had to relent. This is God's word and if he says that while we were still sinners he died for us out of his love then what can I say to that?! Am I more righteous than God?! Never! So... please listen to the song. When you think of it in light of Romans 5:8 you will see that it is indeed God-centered. It's all about what he does, how he loves. Especially for those of us that love to do good works, this song is important, the verse is even more important. We must understand in the depths of our souls that God does not love us because of the good works we do, he never has, and he never will. We do good works out of a loving, faith-filled, grace-filled heart, we work because he works in us. Yet his love does NOT depend on ANYTHING we/I do. Here is What Love Really Means by JJ Heller.

God's Gifts

2011-10-12T07:17:00.000-07:00

Our God is a loving father who gives many gifts to his sons and daughters. In James 1:5 it says he gives generously without reproach. God is a lavish giver, he does not give begrudgingly. He is our provider, the font of every blessing. Blessing here is not meant just as some good thing that happens, the "blessings" of God encompass the entire set (to use a mathematical term) of all his provisions and workings for his people. His provision and presence is in all things big and small. His magnanimity was shown most profoundly at the cross. Yet, nothing is too small for him to care about.

I was desperately needing a tissue while unpacking from our move earlier in the week, and before the words had completely left my mouth there was a box of tissue at the top of the box I was just opening up. This happened several times in the last 3 days. It touches me deeply to know my Lord cares for me in ways like this. We feel his presence in our home and during this move in particular. We had been thinking about downsizing since I had the baby last March. Our Lord providentially set the plan in motion; it was his timing, his house, his plan. We moved from a 4000 sq. ft house to a 1523 sq. ft. patio home and we are loving everything about it. So whether it's the blessing of a new home or the blessing of a nearby tissue box, let's give the sacrifice of praise to our God, from whom all blessings flow.

About Today's Sabbath Song

2011-10-09T07:09:00.001-07:00

Gungor was one of the opening acts the other night when we went to see David Crowder. We were very impressed by Michael Gungor and his wife Lisa who during the concert played not only the xylophone but also a pump organ and sang with him. He played an acoustic guitar (sometimes he switched to a banjo) and used a foot pedal to play the bass drum. They were joined by a session musician on the cello and beat box, but unfortunately I didn't catch his name. He may have been the only cardigan wearing beat boxing cellist they could find. Like I said, we were very impressed. So let me add another Gungor Sabbath Song this morning: "Song for my Family"

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